


Jolly Cooperation

by DigitalThespian



Series: Permutations [8]
Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: Character Study, Characters Play Dungeons & Dragons, Dark Souls (Video Game) References, Dungeons & Dragons 3.5 Edition, Dungeons & Dragons References, F/M, Family Fluff, Fluff, Getting Together, Implied Sexual Content, Minor Original Character(s), Personal Growth, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Reconciliation, Time Loop
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:42:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 24,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28409436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DigitalThespian/pseuds/DigitalThespian
Summary: Richard just wants to do right by his daughters, all Kent haseverwanted is to keep his loved ones safe, and as more and more of the townsfolk Remember.. Demetrius can't help but notice things that don't quite make sense.Whyishis wife acting so strangely?Why is Richard suddenly trying to help him reconnect with Sebastian, and close the rift between him and the farmer?And how is it that Kent—who avoids talking about the war atall costs—trusts the farmer enough to ask him to helpchronicleit?
Relationships: Maru/Male Player (Stardew Valley), Robin/Demetrius (Stardew Valley)
Series: Permutations [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2073213
Comments: 4
Kudos: 9





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> As usual, let me know if I forgot any tags!

Haley plopped the cushion back on the couch, flopping down onto it. "Well, that's that. I guess that farmer does have _some_ sense."

Emily snorted. "What, got a crush already?"

Haley froze. " _What_?"

"Nothing, nevermind, I was just being catty." Emily turned to leave.

"Emily."

The girl in question paused at the surprisingly non-combative tone. "Yeah?"

"..That's not how this went last time."

Emily whirled. "You Remember?!"

"Wait, _you_ remember!?"

Emily flinched. "..Yeah, sorry."

"Why are you sorry, if you tried to tell me I would have thought you were _insane_."

Emily laughed humorlessly. "I mean, yeah, but you do anyway."

"..I'm sorry, Emily. You don't deserve that from me."

Emily was floored. "Haley.."

"So like.. what the hell? Why did we start over?"

"Uh.. you fell in love with Kaleb. We think that's what causes people to Remember."

" _We?!_ "

"..Actually, just.. come with me." Emily pulled out her phone, texting the usual suspects.

* * *

"What the _fuck_?! All of you—wait, _Robin?!_ "

She held up her hands defensively. "There's more to this than that."

"Than you fucking the farmer?!"

"I didn't—"

"She Remembered a few loops ago when he didn't show up at all, since she meets him at the bus stop." Maru cut in.

"..Oh. Sorry, Robin."

"Oh—you're forgiven." Robin blinked. "Wow, I was not prepared for you to not be back to year one Haley."

"Okay, so like, level with me here; everyone else?"

Elliot raised a hand. "I did not; I merely found out because there was no alternative explanation. It was loop five, I believe, the same as Robin."

"Whoa, _five_?"

Leah nodded. "This is seven. I think.. Abigail?"

"Seven." Abigail confirmed. "I'm the only one who Remembers loop zero, as I've been calling it. It's up to you guys how much you wanna share."

"Real quick; everyone else dated him?"

Abigail pointed at Maru. "Maru and I actually married him, but yeah. Or, I was about to. The first day of the first loop was supposed to be my wedding, and I am never not going to be salty about that."

Haley turned to Emily. "I'm sorry, Emily. Obviously I didn't know, but.. that must have sucked."

There was a stunned silence, but Emily just smiled, tearing up. "Haley, that means so much to me."

"Alright, alright, hug me and let's get this over with, I know it's coming." Haley rolled her eyes, but she was clearly still smiling.

* * *

The 'Usual Suspects'—as Abigail had dubbed them—sat in Emily and Haley's living room, chatting while the TV ran idly; Haley had been watching, but she had quickly lost interest once others began to arrive, and no one had bothered to turn it off.

Suddenly, the program cut out, replaced by an upbeat newscast-style jingle.

_Breaking News: Gotoro Empire suffers crushing defeat at Coralhelm!_

The image cut again to a news anchor—with a Ferngill flag-patterned tie, of course—wearing a big smile. "Greetings, good citizens of the Ferngill Republic! Only a few days ago, our brave troops defended the beachhead at Coralhelm with a ferocity that will no doubt live on history for decades to come! The Gotorans landed in the dead of night, hoping to catch our forces by surprise, but instead they were met by the unbreakable spirit of the Ferngill Republic!"

The anchor gestured to the screen behind him, and there was a collective gasp as it showed an image of none other than Kent, helping a wounded soldier out of the line of fire with a determined expression. "It was all thanks to the keen eyes and sharp wit of one Kent Parker, who spotted the Gotorans coming in time to alert his battalion commander! Prepared for the attack, the Ferngill 105th made short work of the enemy, leading to a complete rout; what's more, thanks to his unparalleled bravery and cunning, Kent was able to rescue over _fifty_ of his fellow troops who had been injured in the fighting, making this the first battle of the entire war without a _single_ Ferngillian fatality! Now over to Alehandra for a live interview with one of the soldiers saved."

The screen changed to a man laying in a hospital bed with bandages on his face and torso, a reporter at his side. "Thank you, Tomas. I'm here with Grant Hutchinson, a private in the 105th who volunteered to share his story. Grant, you were wounded in the initial skirmish; what was going through your mind as the battle unfolded?"

Grant looked away from the reporter, staring into the middle distance. "..We knew it was coming, which was the only thing that saved my entire unit; we left our camp as it was, and waited further up the beach, so they wouldn't know we were on to them." He was silent a moment. "..then the entire campsite just.. exploded. Anti-personnel grenades." He shivered. "If we'd still been in camp.. they would have had to ship us home in a barrel. If they could have even done that.."

"That must have been terrifying."

He nodded vacantly. "The shooting started almost immediately; it was hard to tell what was going on. One second I was taking potshots from a makeshift trench, then the next I was on the ground; I couldn't hear anything for what felt like ages, but my.." He swallowed hard. "My legs were tingling in a bad way, and when I looked down.." He laid a hand over his middle. "I just saw a bloody tear in my uniform."

"What happened?"

"I found out later it was an airburster; shrapnel got me right through the belly. I was sure that was it for me; in basic, when one of the recruits asked what to do for first aid if that happened.. the sergeant just looked at him and said 'If you can get them to a field hospital in less than ten minutes, do it. Otherwise, shoot the poor bastard in the head. Don't let them suffer.'"

The reporter was stunned. "But here you are."

He nodded. "Here I am.. he saved me."

"Tell us about that."

"..He was incredible." He swallowed again, tears in his eyes. "There I was, silently praying that someone, _anyone_ could help me, and there he was, like he _knew_." He looked at the reporter. "He jumped down into the trench, and his uniform was covered in blood, but there were no tears; I was the twenty-sixth person he saved that night."

"Did he say anything to you?"

"I could barely hear, but I could sort of read his lips; he looked at me, looked at my stomach, and without a single moment's hesitation he dashed over and scooped me up." He laughed quietly. "I think he said something like 'I'm sorry, son, this is going to hurt.'"

Everyone in the room realized with a start that the man in the bed couldn't have been older than twenty.

"And then he looked at me with this _fire_ in his eyes, and I'll never forget what he said. 'Hang on. I'm getting you out of here; you've got a long life ahead of you, and I'm _not_ letting them take that from you.'" The young man rubbed at his eyes. "He carried me all the way up the beach, to the field hospital we'd set up. He put me down, and just before I blacked out I saw one of the orderlies try to stop him; he shook his head once, and pushed him away—he wasn't mean, or aggressive, he just.. said no, and that was that. He ran back out of the tent at a dead sprint. I don't know how he had the stamina to carry that many people out of an active warzone like that, and I don't know how he had the presence of mind to know where to look, but.."

The young man looked at the camera. "There is _no one_ who embodies what it means to be a hero like Kent Parker."

"You heard it from the source, folks; Kent Parker, national hero. Back to you, Tomas."

There was an awestruck silence. Robin shook herself out of it first. "We need to go see Jodi."

"Not all at once, we'll filter in," Maru chimed in.

* * *

Haley and Emily went first, since they lived next door. They opened the door to find Jodi sobbing on the floor, and Emily rushed over. "Jodi!"

She threw her arms around Emily. "I'm so glad he's okay."

Emily hugged her gently. "Me too."

"So like, I didn't know him that well, was he always a super tactical genius? That was seriously impressive."

Jodi shook her head. "No, he.. he always used to joke his best quality was being good at following instructions."

Emily and Haley exchanged a glance. "What do you think happened?"

"I.." Jodi worried her lower lip. "It's almost like.. he knew what was coming."

Robin entered. "Did she say he knew it was coming?"

Emily looked over. "We're not sure." The actual meaning was clear to Robin; they couldn't be sure if Kent and Jodi Remembered.

"Where's Sam?"

"He's at work."

Slowly the others arrived, and slowly Jodi began to smile. Abigail grinned, giving Jodi a hug. "So, Mrs. National Hero."

"Oh, gosh, I suppose I am, aren't I..?"

* * *

They made sure at least one of them had the news on at all times from then on; a few weeks went by, and finally, it was confirmed.

_Breaking News: National Hero Kent Parker defuses tense standoff!_

Abigail stared a moment. "..Oh yeah, he Remembers."

The anchor reappeared, and behind him was an image of Kent in the middle of a field command center courtyard, hands held out in a placating gesture; across the field was another Ferngill solider—grenade in hand and a desperate look on their face, finger looped through the pin. "We bring you yet another story of courage from Kent Parker; a fellow soldier had cracked under the strain of life on the front lines, and took the command tent hostage. But Kent bravely put his life on the line to talk the situation out, using his background as a resident of a small coastal town as a way to relate to the perpetrator. A drone captured the following footage."

The image sprang to life, wind rushing past the microphone, but it was possible to faintly make out what the two were saying. "They don't care about us, Kent! Why are we doing this? What have _they_ ever done for _us_?! I have a husband back home, and a daughter!"

"I get it, Charlie, I do; I have a wife and two sons. I love them more than anything. But that's _why_ we have to do this."

"This is _hell_ , Kent!"

"You're right; I've seen things I can never make go away. I've had to kill people, and I've seen my friends killed. But Charlie.. my wife _hasn't_. My sons don't know the horrors I've suffered through, and they won't have to. _That's_ why we're here. Because we love our families. Because we would endure _anything_ if it meant _they_ didn't have to."

"I.."

Kent walked closer, slowly. "It's okay, Charlie. Things are awful. That's not our fault, but it's not command's fault either. We love our families.. and so do they."

Charlie sunk to his knees, hand falling away from the pin. He let the grenade drop the remaining few inches to the grass, and Kent knelt in front of him, pulling him into a hug. The footage stopped, Kent in profile with a compassionate expression.

"God _damn_ , Kent." Abigail let out a whistle. She made her way outside, heading to Emily's house, as it had become the new meeting place. She went inside, noting that only Maru and Robin had yet to arrive.

Leah waved. "Hey, Abigail. What do you think?"

"Oh, he definitely Remembers. That was way too specific of a motivation for him to have not known ahead of time."

"..do you think he'll be home early?" Everyone looked at Emily. "I mean.. we all remember the.. the Coralhelm Massacre, he's changing the tide of the war."

"..Oh shit, you're totally right, Kent might _actually_ end the war early.."

* * *

A few more weeks passed. On one lovely Fall day, Jodi burst into the Saloon. " _Kent is coming home!_ "

There was a raucous cheer. "Yeah!" "The triumphant hero returns!" "I'm so happy for you!"

"They just signed the peace treaty yesterday!"

* * *

Kaleb ran up to the bus stop, panting. "I am _so_ sorry, my cat ran off and I had to track him down."

Kent smiled. "It's okay; it's important to take care of those you care about. My name's Kent."

"Kaleb Buss; I'm Kaehr's grandson."

"It's good to meet you. He was a good man."

Kaleb straightened up. "Thanks."

Kent looked back at the assembled townsfolk with a small smile. "It's nice to be home, finally."

* * *

"Okay, like.. your dad _clearly_ hates me, was it something I said?"

"Uh.." Maru sighed. "I think he thinks you're seeing Robin behind his back."

"What? No way! I ain't no homewrecker."

" _I_ know that, but people aren't always reasonable.."

Kaleb huffed. "Well I guess I'll just have to demonstrate I'm not a bad guy."

"Oh no; what are you planning."

"I'm gonna make friends with your dad, or at least, I'm gonna be an exemplary neighbor to the point he can't deny it."

"Only you could make 'I'm going to be friends with you' sound threatening."

"Hey! Abigail could absolutely pull it off, come on now; honestly, you and your mom probably could too, if you put your mind to it."

"I.. thanks?"

"Aw, hell.. that was kinda rude, huh?"

Maru giggled. "Maybe a bit, but I know you didn't mean anything by it."

"Thanks." He smiled gratefully. "Well, I have to be getting back to work. I'll see you around?"

"Yeah! Definitely! Bye Kaleb!"

* * *

"You're a bit harsh on the new farmer." Richard tilted his head curiously. "Did something happen?"

Demetrius scowled. "..he just rubs me the wrong way. Robin and I have been having more and more arguments lately, and the day he showed up she completely changed. What am I supposed to think?"

"You think he's after Robin?"

"Yeah. Little bastard.."

"He's not."

Demetrius looked over in shock, then his expression shifted to one of irritation. "And how would _you_ know that?!"

Richard raised a brow. "Did you forget all the years I spent chasing Caroline? I _know_ what it looks like when a man is after another man's sweetheart."

"Oh—I.." Demetrius looked away, setting his jaw.

"I don't think it's unreasonable for you to be worried, or upset, Demetrius. You love her. That's enough to make people do far worse. Maybe you've let your temper get the best of you—and don't say you don't have one, I've known you for years—but I don't think you can be held responsible for being emotional when it comes to the woman you vowed to spend the rest of your life with."

"I.. Thanks, Richard."

"Of course. Besides.. I of all people understand how you feel, you know that. Both because of Caroline.. and Daisy."

Demetrius looked back with a concerned expression. "Right.. you did mention things went wrong with Daisy, didn't you.. Are you alright?"

Richard sighed softly. "..I saw the writing on the wall. It doesn't make it feel any better, but.. I at least knew it was coming." He smiled to himself at the joke. "But in a way.. it's for the best. It made me re-evaluate my priorities. My daughters didn't deserve to be thrown headlong into adulthood like that, and while I can't give that childhood back.. I can be there for them."

Demetrius was quiet for a while. "..how did you reconnect with them?"

"I told them I was sorry. For leaving them to fend for themselves, for thinking that a bi-weekly letter could replace a father figure. I was honest about my missteps. And then I made sure to show them that above all else.. I was going to be there for them. When Emily mentioned difficulty finding a source of affordable fabric, I called someone Daisy and I worked with in the past who did costume design, and he agreed to increase his order size so Emily could take advantage of his bulk rates, provided she paid shipping to Pelican Town and told him what she needed enough in advance. When Haley told me she was having trouble figuring out what she wanted to do with her life, I helped her look into online universities and technical programs." Richard looked at Demetrius out of the corner of his eye. "What are _you_ going to do? You help Maru with her experiments; what are you going to do to support Sebastian?"

"I.. don't know. His world is so different than mine. I'm an awful musician, and computers have never been my strong suit.. my classmates in college used to tease me about doing my statistical regressions by hand rather use a computer."

"You did statistics _by hand_ to avoid needing a computer?" Richard was stunned. "You have to be _unbelievably_ good at math for that to have been a viable option."

Demetrius smirked to himself. "I was valedictorian at my university, remember? Computers and music are two of the few things I'm _not_ good at. That and creating things with my hands; it's part of why I was so drawn to Robin. She's no genius _academically_ , but she's _unrivaled_ as a craftswoman."

"Is there anyone who could teach you about computers? It sounds like you just never learned, not that you _couldn't_."

Demetrius grimaced. "..Sebastian wouldn't, he would think I was patronizing him. Which just leaves.."

"Ah. And you're not sure if you can show weakness by revealing something you're not good at to someone who you have serious problems with."

"I—I'm not afraid to show weakness," Demetrius protested weakly.

"You can't fool me, my friend. You clawed your way to the top because to do otherwise was to prove your detractors right. The deck was stacked against you from the start. I would be astonished if you _weren't_ afraid to show weakness. It may be a so-called character flaw; but like most flaws, it was born of necessity. Am I wrong?"

"..No. I had to be right, I had to be the best, because if I wasn't.."

Richard nodded sadly. "Yeah." He clapped Demetrius on the shoulder. "Well, how about this; I have to talk to Kaleb anyway, he's going to teach me how to help Emily manage her online boutique. I'll mention in passing that you were trying to learn more about computers, so you would be able to understand Sebastian's work, and knowing him, he'll offer to help on the spot."

"But—I don't need you to—"

"How else are you going to ask? Besides, hearing it from a third party will make it clear you're not out to entrap him—not that he would believe that, from what I've seen, but you're not on the best of terms."

"..alright." Demetrius let out a long breath. "I need to accept help more often. Thanks, Richard."

"Any time. Parenting doesn't come with a manual, and neither does life. All we have is each other."

"When did you become so philosophical?"

"Besides my philosophy degree?"

"Oh, right.." Richard laughed as Demetrius scratched his head sheepishly, and soon the two were both laughing. "I forget you _have_ a degree sometimes, mister tournament fencer."

"You aren't the first one, and you likely won't be the last."

* * *

"So; I hear you've been having some computer troubles." Kaleb smiled easily.

"I.. suppose you could say that." Demetrius still had some reservations about all this; he believed Richard, but it didn't undo the existing mistrust.

"You want any help, or do you wanna puzzle it out on your own?"

Demetrius blinked. He hadn't expected to be offered that choice. "I don't really know how much puzzling could help, since I'm still standing outside the cab holding the keys to the _wrong car_."

"Ohh, gotcha, you're at the stage where nothing makes any goddamn sense; because for all their power, computers are _really_ bad at teaching people how to use them."

"So that _is_ true? That does make me feel a little better."

"Man, I've heard stories of people who thought CD drives were cup holders. It's not _that_ unreasonable if they have zero context or information, but to someone who knows better it's absolutely baffling. Computers and tech are full of that kind of thing."

Demetrius stared in disbelief. "..A cup holder."

Kaleb shrugged. "I mean, if you're not looking for it, it's hard to see that there's a spot for something to go there that isn't the big hole in the tray. Plus molded plastic parts are weirdly shaped all the time; but your shock is exactly what I mean, computers are basically witchcraft right up until they're laughably mundane. Nuclear reactor to Zippo lighter in an afternoon."

"..I'd never thought of it that way."

"Right? So." Kaleb clapped his hands together. "What seems to be the issue?"

"I can boot it up, but making it worth my time is the problem."

"Oh, yeah, like 'for as long as this took I could have just done it by hand'?"

"Exactly."

"In the meantime, until you get there, it helps to think of it like learning to use any other tool with a steep learning curve, or learning to do something the 'right way'; once you pull it off, you'll save the time back later. But for now, what are you trying to accomplish?"

"I'm not sure what I _can_ accomplish; that's the other problem."

"How often do you need to look things up while you work? How often do you need to record and reference several sets of numbers?"

"Fairly often, and all the time."

"Great place to start; ask Robin if she can get a wall mount for a respectable size monitor in your lab, and I'll help you set up a few programs so you can flip between data sets and be able to search the Internet. Or if it's too esoteric of a search for the web, I can help you scan in your technical manuals or whatever so you can search the text for the compound or whatever you're looking for."

"Just.. the whole book? You can _do_ that?"

"Depends on how nicely I can get it to scan; if it's a good scan there are programs that can parse the image into actual text, and then you can just control-F—that's the find command—and it'll let you jump between every place that exact string of characters shows up."

"Alright; show me how to do that."

"Can do!"

* * *

"Kent, dear..?"

"What is it, Jodi? You sound worried; is everything alright?"

"Forgive me if this seems strange, but.. does the farmer seem.. familiar to you?"

"He reminds me of someone I knew once, is that what you mean?"

"I'm.. not sure how to explain." She tilted her head side to side, considering something. "Actually.. do the words 'Starlight Memorial' mean anything to you..?"

He blinked, looking at her surprise. "You remember too?"

She sagged in relief. "Oh thank goodness, I thought I was losing my sanity."

He shook his head. "It's how I knew where to find all those soldiers in the Battle of Coralhelm, and how I knew what to say to Charlie." He paused a moment. "Is it just us? Does Sam remember? Or Vince?"

She shook her head. "The boys don't, but I'm not sure about the rest of town. I suspect Haley and Emily might, they get along far better than I remember.."

He nodded. "Are you going to ask?"

"How would I?" There was a knock at the door, and Jodi furrowed her brow. "Who could that be..?"

She crossed the room, opening the door to reveal.. Abigail. "Hey there; I was talking to the farmer last week—he's a really nice guy—and he mentioned he was a craft beer guy at one point, and I remembered Kent used to do brewing, so I thought I'd come ask."

Jodi blinked. "Oh. Um, would you like to come in?"

"Thanks!" Jodi stepped out of the way to let Abigail in. "Are Sam and Vincent home?"

"No, they're out with Penny and Jas; why?"

Abigail smiled softly. "Needed to be sure. First I'd like to apologize; what I said earlier was partially a lie. I know you hate that, Kent, but I had to be cagey. Kent only picked up brewing _after_ the war.. and that was _last_ time."

They stared. "You.." Jodi covered her mouth. "You remember too," she whispered.

"Yeah. Not just me; there are a few of us. If it's alright with you two, I'll text the others and have them come by so we can bring you up to speed."

"Who else remembers?" Kent tilted his head. " _Why_ do we remember?"

"I'll get to the second part; but it's me, Emily, Maru, Robin, Leah, Elliot, Haley, and Richard."

"Oh, that's a lot more people than I expected when you said 'a few'."

"I.. guess it is, huh? I don't really think about it, I've Remembered for a long time now. This is the seventh repeat, and I've been in since the beginning."

" _Seven_..?"

"We're not sure why or how it happens. All we know is that it's three years, the farmer doesn't Remember, and we can't let him find out. Something about catastrophic reality-warping magic stuff." Abigail shrugged. "Other than that, we think getting attached to the farmer is what causes people to Remember."

* * *

"Oh, hey there, Demetrius." Kent waved casually, though the slightly tense posture didn't drop, which was odd; then Demetrius remembered wide-open spaces made him nervous now. "I was just on my way to Kaleb's farm."

"What..?" Demetrius muttered. "You know the farmer?"

"His grandfather was a good man, and I can tell he is too. He's been helping me write down the parts of my time in Gotoro that are actually worth remembering."

Demetrius was floored. Kent was willing to talk about the _war_..? But he took practically every excuse he could get to change the subject, and the farmer had hardly been here for a year, so what..

There was something nagging at him in the back of his mind, but he couldn't put his finger on it. "I'm glad you feel comfortable talking about it," he said vacantly.

Kent laughed. "You know, it's strange; I only met him a season or so ago, but it's like I've known him for years."

He waved again, walking away and leaving a stunned Demetrius in his wake. "..known him for years.." Demetrius murmured. "..known him for.." He looked up suddenly. " _Robin_."

* * *

"Demetrius? You're back early, what are— _OOF_." Robin cut off as Demetrius cannoned into her, throwing his arms around her. "What—are you okay?!"

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry..! You—the farmer, you—"

"Demetrius, what—I'm glad you believe me, but what brought this on..?"

"Kent, he—he said the farmer is helping him journal his time in the war, and then he said it was like he'd known him for years, and earlier Richard told me the farmer wasn't after you and he was so _sure_ and I didn't quite understand _why_ , and—Robin, the _grange competition_ , the—he—" He cut off, before continuing much less frantically. "..you're not different because you're seeing the farmer, you're different because _you remember too_ ," Demetrius whispered.

"Wait, you Remember?! But it's the middle of the loop—"

Demetrius pulled away slightly, confused. "Loop? Has this happened more than once..?"

"This is.. seven, I think. Abigail was first. Being fond of the farmer—for whatever reason—or a sufficient variation can cause people to Remember, we just thought it had to be at or near the beginning."

Demetrius started. "I have to apologize to him—"

Robin cut him off gently. "You mean well, but we can't tell him. Just.. I'll text the Usual Suspects, we'll bring you up to speed."

He gave her an amused look. "I could _hear_ the capital letters there," he chuckled.

"It's what Abigail nicknamed our little group, once it got to be more than four of us. Oh—" Robin took a deep breath, steeling herself. "Okay, so I want to start this by saying my behavior change was due to the loops, _not_ being involved with the farmer. I was never doing anything behind your back."

"Oh..kay? I believe you already, hon; we.. just established that, right? Sorry if I wasn't clear enough."

"I know, but when you talk to the others you're going to get conflicting information from what I've already told you, and that's because I Remembered in loop two, they think it was loop five. You and I were having a really rough patch in the first month, and I was asking myself what I was going to do if it really did fall apart—"

Demetrius nodded slowly. "..And so you considered the farmer as a potential.. replacement is the wrong word.. alternative?"

Robin laughed wryly. "I suppose you could say that, though the consideration didn't last long, he was a _mess_ in that loop.."

She was quiet for a moment, and Demetrius laid a hand on her shoulder gently. "..Robin? You don't have to talk about it, I understand enough to know why you'd Remember," he murmured. "Though.. actually, if it didn't last, why _did_ you Remember..?"

"I.. I Remember because he died a week later. Suicide. I.. was the one who found him. I hadn't sorted through it yet, not entirely, and then.."

Demetrius' eyes widened. "Oh god, Robin, I'm so sorry.. that.. must have been _awful_."

"..Yeah. But.. Abigail and I could lean on each other. She was set to marry him the first day of that loop.. she was.. _devastated_ , and no one could understand why, and it wasn't until the next loop that I did understand. But I also told her what I'm telling you now, and she agreed to keep it secret that I Remembered, since I was afraid people wouldn't believe me.."

Demetrius pulled her into a hug. "I believe you. You're not irrational. Everything you said and did makes perfect sense with the knowledge we're repeating a three year span; it only seemed cagey and suspicious because the truth would have seemed like an outright insult to my intelligence, and.. I wouldn't have taken that well. I'm sorry, Robin."

She looked at him with tears in her eyes. "It's okay, Demetrius. I'm just so thankful to have my husband back.."

He shook his head. "You deserve more than just that. I.. I think it's time I started to make a serious effort to work through some of the stuff that's been causing tension between us.." He smiled crookedly. "I get the feeling I can afford to put my research on hold for the time being. Can't imagine why."

She hugged him tightly. "I'm so proud of you, honey.. That's a big thing to do, I know how important your research is to you.."

"It is, but.. I have to be willing to admit I need help, and I have to be willing to meet my family halfway on things. My research is important, it's my life's work; but I've realized there's no point to having a 'life's work' if I let my _life_ —my _family_ —fall apart."

Robin burst into tears. " _Demetrius_! I've missed you so much," she cried.

He sniffed, tears pooling in his eyes as well. "..I've missed you too, my love.."

"So.." Robin wiped her eyes. "What are you going to do?"

Demetrius nodded once with a determined expression. "..I'm going to ask the farmer for help."

* * *

Demetrius steeled himself before knocking on the door to the farmhouse.

Kaleb opened it, blinking in confusion when he saw who it was. "Oh—hey, Demetrius. What can I do for you?"

"Kaleb, can I ask you for help with something?"

"Hell yeah, let's hear it." Kaleb stepped aside to let him in.

"I.. I haven't been good to Sebastian, in the past. I was angry, about quite a few things, but none of them were his fault. I've since seen that I was wrong to behave how I did, but I want to make things right with him. Unfortunately.. We've grown so distant I'm afraid anything I try will come across as a token gesture, and make things worse."

Kaleb looked at him a moment, considering. "..How much time are you willing to invest? I've got a few ideas, but obviously time can be an issue."

"I can make the time."

He nodded, smiling. "I approve; not that you need my approval, but hey. You did come to me, so I'd assume you at least think I'm competent." He grinned. "So, if you've got the time, I've got just the thing. I actually have two laptops; one was my first laptop in college, the second is the replacement for the first, so my current one. I can just lend you my old one, and you can play through Dark Souls. It's a game I know very, _very_ well, and Sebastian does too. There's something of a universal camaraderie amongst fans of the series, but more importantly there's a lot there to talk about. You can either ask him about whatever you're having trouble with, or just kinda drop the bomb that you finished the game."

"Isn't that game supposed to be really difficult?"

"Yes."

"Wouldn't it make more sense to start with something easier?"

"Not really, honestly; Dark Souls has its own set of behaviors you have to learn to be good at it. I've been playing games from like, age six, and I played Dark Souls for the first time _way_ after it came out, at like.. age twenty, ish. It kicked my ass _so hard_. Besides, you said you wanted to avoid it looking like a token gesture. Beating _fucking Dark Souls_ is about as far from a token gesture as it gets."

"..Alright. Let's do this. Would it be alright if I played at your farmhouse? It would be strange for me to have your computer for no explainable reason, and also it would be difficult to hide the fact that I'd started playing a video game, something I'd previously been somewhat dismissive of at best, and derisive at worst."

"Oh, absolutely. I can provide tips if you really need them. I got a lot of help, and I know I never would have gotten into the series without it; but in a weird catch-22, I also wish I'd gotten to experience it blind. But without my existing love for the series, I never would have actually gotten through."

"I'll keep that in mind."

* * *

"Alright, I've been playing for a while, and I _really_ do not understand how this game is supposed to be fun."

Kaleb paused. "Did you get to the Bell Gargoyles?"

"The _what_?"

"Okay, that answers that. That's the boss that my friends and I consider the point at which you can safely say you've not 'given up', you just don't like the game. But I can offer advice, if you like, since I know you're doing this for Sebastian, and I do wanna see you succeed." He came and sat down across the table. "So, where are you right now?"

"It'll be easier to show you, I can't remember the names very well yet, it's all just one awful place after another."

"Yeah, you know, that's fair. You gotta admire the scenery sometimes though."

Demetrius picked up his controller, moving through the character select screen. "What scenery? It's just been caverns the whole time!"

Kaleb blinked, frowning slightly as he got up to walk around the table. "Huh? Did you go to the _Catacombs_? Jesus, no wonder you're having trouble."

"That would make me feel better, but no, I walked right back out once the skeletons got _back up_ , I'm somewhere else."

The game loaded in, and Kaleb's jaw dropped. " _WHAT?!_ Why are you in the _Demon Ruins?! How_ are you in the Demon—Did you already beat _Ceaseless Discharge!?_ Wait, that means you beat Kellogg's already, Jesus, and apparently with the Zweihander? I mean like, sure, you've got the DPS, but that's _not_ a forgiving weapon to use," Kaleb muttered.

" _Kellogg's_?"

"Oh, sorry, community nickname for Quelaag, Chaos Witch. The joke name is Kellogg's Breakfast Witch."

Demetrius laughed. "That was the giant spider lady that spit lava, right?"

"..Yeah, okay, so I'm assuming you went down the elevator, and into Blighttown?"

"Yeah, because there were dragons that shoot lighting blocking the other way, and _ghosts_ blocking the _other_ other way."

Kaleb just huffed out a laugh. "Demetrius, Kellogg's is like, the.." He counted on his fingers. "Not counting the Asylum Demon in the tutorial, Kellogg's is the _fifth_ major boss. The Gargoyles are _second_. You started with the master key—"

"How did you know that?"

"The door to the Valley of Drakes is supposed to be locked, you get the key when you're _leaving_ Blighttown; you went in the back way and fought what is arguably one of the most difficult early game bosses _first_."

Demetrius stared for a moment, then slowly grinned. "You know, actually, maybe I _do_ see the appeal of this game."

Kaleb threw up his fists. "One of us! One of us!" He chanted, much to Demetrius' confusion, though his grin never faded.

* * *

"Hey, Demetrius. How goes the Souls-ing?"

"Well, Ornstein is a jerk."

Kaleb burst out laughing. "Yeah, he really is!"

"And big Ornstein is an even bigger jerk, figuratively and literally."

"Oof; you need a hand?"

"And then I stabbed him to death. With Solaire's help, of course, because jolly cooperation."

"..That is like the _one_ fight it's better to not summon him, because having summons gives the boss more health, and Ornstein is—predictably—resistant to lightning."

"But in his infinite patience and kindness lay the keys to victory; he got stabbed instead of me while I killed Smough."

"..You _really_ like Solaire—which like, as you should, the Warriors of Sunlight covenant was nicknamed the Sun Bros for a reason, and thus did Solaire become Brolaire." Kaleb laughed. "Also that was pretty much exactly what I did, because I wanted Ornstein's soul."

"I noticed I only got one, is that dependent on who you kill last?"

"Yeah. You can make that into the Dragonslayer Spear. Pro-tip—normally I don't offer advice, but this will really only save you time—wait, do you have the lightning spear? The melee weapon, not the miracle."

"There's a lightning spear _miracle_?"

"Oh, yeah, it's awesome. It's what Solaire uses, dude."

"I thought that was just because he was special."

"Nope, you can get that too. You need twenty-five faith—well, technically twenty, but you need twenty-five to join the covenant, so. And it's also good for the Dragonslayer Spear, which does lightning damage that scales with faith. It's one of the only lightning weapons that scales."

"I do have the spear, by the way. Damn chest monster ate me the first time, scared the shit out of me."

"Mood. Yeah, take that to the giant blacksmith and have him un-upgrade it into a +10 spear, and then he can turn it into the Dragonslayer Spear using Ornstein's soul. I don't know if you have the stats to _use_ it, but hey."

"You told me I can throw lightning, I'm a faith build now."

"A man after my own heart."

* * *

"..Are—are you making a _Chaos Zweihander_." Kaleb was barely restraining himself from laughing.

"I was considering it; is it not a good idea?"

"It's completely viable."

"Then why are you laughing?"

Kaleb just laughed harder.

* * *

Kaleb's phone buzzed, and he was surprised that it was a text from Demetrius.

Demetrius: help solaire is attacking me what do I do

Demetrius: how do I make him stop

Kaleb: did you accidentally hit him or what

Demetrius: i dropped my controller on accident

Kaleb: just run; go back to where the gargoyles were at some point and talk to the dude with the really punchable face holding his arms out like he wants a hug

Kaleb: you can 'request absolution', and Solaire wont be hostile anymore

Demetrius: I appreciate how the only properly observed grammar on your end not related to cadence in this entire conversation was capitalizing Solaire.

Kaleb: i appreciate how you went from no grammar to normal grammar because you werent trying to avoid Solaire anymore

Demetrius: No, he just killed me.

Kaleb: oh, i think thatll still be fine?

Kaleb: guess youll find out

* * *

Kaleb walked into the farmhouse, smiling when he saw Demetrius focusing intently. Kaleb didn't say anything, skirting around to see what was going on and if it was okay to interrupt. "Oh, damn, that's the Kiln."

Demetrius nodded. "And that's Solaire's sign; I was hoping I could summon him for this."

Kaleb laughed. "You opened the shortcut in Izalith before visiting Oswald for absolution, good stuff."

"Wha—how do you always do that?!"

"You know how you got the Sunlight Maggot?"

"Yeah?"

"Normally if that bug is still alive when you enter Izalith, that's it for Solaire. He loses it and tries to kill you. You have to do a whole bunch of convoluted bullshit to open the shortcut from the other side, and kill the bug before you go in. _OR_ , you can aggro Solaire—which, due to the way NPCs are handled, halts progression of his quest until you de-aggro or kill him. So since you aggroed him, then killed the bug before you were absolved, he never went crazy, and therefore you can summon him here."

"This has just been the run of me accidentally doing everything right, or at least, doing everything wrong in a way that ends up working out."

"Isn't that just like, _life_?"

"..Too real."

Kaleb cackled. "Good! Good response, I like it. Alright, I'll let you bro it up with Solaire; mind if I hang back and watch?"

"Sure, go ahead." Demetrius entered the boss fog; moments later, a melancholy piano piece began to play. "..What? Why is the music so.. _sad_?"

"Do you want me to answer that?"

"Not now, concentrating."

With the help of Solaire's bravery (and very large HP pool), Demetrius was able to defeat Gwyn, Lord of Sunlight. He looked around the boss room, noting the bonfire and walking up to it, then he paused, muttering to himself. "'Link the fire'.. I have a feeling this kills you, and not in the usual way."

Kaleb didn't say anything.

"..But can I really walk away? If the explanation for phantoms is to be believed, Solaire was _here—_ or will be? But if he _was_ killed by Gwyn.." Demetrius was silent a few moments. "..I have to. I owe it to him; how could I walk away after we both came so far? After everything he did to help me on _my_ journey.." He pressed the button, and watched as his character reached out to the bonfire, the flames traveling up their arm and enveloping them, before blooming outward to envelop the entire room, spilling out into the world. "..If only Solaire could have known what he came for was with him all along; in the end, it turns out the sun was me."

Demetrius started slightly when he heard a loud sniff from behind him. He turned around to see Kaleb hiding his face. "I'm sorry, I ruined the moment!"

"Wha—are you _crying_?"

"It was really touching! You _were_ your character for a second there, and I forgot that you don't play games, so you don't have the 'it's just a game' disconnect like I do, this is the _only_ game you've played; so like, this really _was_ a harrowing, frightening, and confusing journey that you went on, not because you _wanted_ to but because there was something you felt was _important._ So of _course_ you'd empathize with Solaire, and Gwyn's boss theme is already really emotional." Kaleb rubbed at his eyes, sniffing loudly again. "Thanks, Demetrius. That.. I got to have an _experience_ , just now. One that I missed when I played, and honestly, one that I've never really seen a game do well before. I didn't think you doing this was gonna end up being something _I_ cherished too, but here we are."

Demetrius was floored. "I.. Yeah, I guess I do really empathize with Solaire. I haven't gotten to the end yet, though; I still don't know if _my_ son is out of reach, too."

Kaleb looked at him with a determined expression. "Then this time it'll be Solaire who makes it; I'm behind you every step of the way, Demetrius."

Demetrius carefully set the controller down, standing up and walking over. He held out his arms, and Kaleb hugged him tightly. "Thank you, Kaleb. That was a lot of fun, and you're right, it was an experience. And now I get to share that with my son."

"You're welcome; I'm happy to get share something this important to me, but it was a real honor to get to show you this, considering the stakes." Kaleb let go, stepping back. "Speaking of which; do you have a plan?"

"Well." Demetrius smiled. "Sebastian has been trying to get us all to play D&D with him; and by all I mean you, Maru, and Robin."

"I want to say he wants you to play too, but it's probably filed under 'I wish, never gonna happen' if he does."

Demetrius nodded. "What do you say to running that game for us? I know that's asking a lot, from what I understand, but I thought it could be nice to have the whole family play together."

" _Deal_. Oh my god, I am _so_ on board. Like yeah, it's a lot of work, but dude, I am _honored_ to be the one you asked to run the Jacobs family bonding D&D game."

He smiled. "I like that about you. Not many people would look at it that way."

"And I don't get why; how is it _not_ amazing to be asked to be part of something so important to you guys?" Kaleb nodded. "But! There is much to be discussed if we're doing this. How much do you know about D&D?"

"I know the 'I attack the darkness' skit, and that's basically it."

Kaleb laughed. "Honestly, good start. It really is like that sometimes."

* * *

The Jacobs family had gathered in the living room, and everything was set; Kaleb stood at the head of the table. They had been confused at first, but he explained that he just liked standing. "I get antsy," he had said.

Maru nodded understandingly, and Sebastian just shrugged. "You do you, bud."

Kaleb clapped his hands together with a grin. "So! I deliberately did _not_ tell any of you what characters the others made; I only gave you all the same basic constraints, and roughly the same levels of hand-waving for rules that proved inconvenient for your character concepts. Obligatory 'as the GM I reserve the right to change things if they end being fuckin' broke.'"

Sebastian snorted, a small smile crossing his face. "It's weird being on this side of the screen. Nice, but weird."

"It's weird being back in the saddle, I haven't run a game in like, six years, so the beginning might be a little rocky, but fuckit, we're to tell a story together and by god I'm gonna do my best to make that happen."

"What do you mean by that?" Robin tilted her head. "I thought you played the bad guys?"

"I play the laws of the universe your characters live in; I cannot count the number of times I have sat and sadly rolled dice as NPCs did things that totally screwed up _everything_ I had planned, because it's just.. what they would have done."

"Can't you just.. have them do something else?"

"Depends on the game, honestly. If it's a game that deals a lot with character interaction or philosophical topics, no, not really, because it would violate the foundation the whole thing is built on."

"Wow, this is a lot more serious than I thought it was."

"I mean, munchkinry has its place."

"' _Munchkinry_?!'" Maru cackled. "What does that even _mean?_ "

"Uh.. you know how I'm weirdly obsessed with being optimal sometimes? It's the essence of that. Some people call it min-maxing, but I personally believe it's the intersection of that and being a murderhobo; and because I know that's the next question, it's exactly what it sounds like. Adventurers don't have homes, usually—that's the hobo part—and they kill a lot of things and take their stuff—the murder part. If your default solution in a given situation is 'I _staab_ it!'" He made an exaggerated stabbing motion. "Then I regret to inform you that you are, in fact, a murderhobo."

The table had dissolved into laughter, and Kaleb smiled. This was gonna be a good campaign.

"Alright, alright; let's get started, shall we?" He turned to Sebastian. "Tell us who you are, and what you're doing; I know you probably don't want to go first, but _I_ can't do it, and I wanted to let the veteran kinda give an example so the others have an idea of what to expect."

He nodded. "I decided to go back to the classics; I'm playing an elven wizard named Elenstar."

Robin raised her hand. "Didn't you say people always had 'of hometown' tacked on? Is this like, a drama thing, or is he just like, not from anywhere?"

"Excellent question; Seb?"

"Elenstar used to have a homeland; but since elves live to be centuries old—and I am not a young elve by any stretch—it's been over a hundred years since my homeland was completely consumed by a curse. No one knows what caused it, or why. It's what I've spent my life trying to figure out. I was barely an adult when things started to go wrong; elves may live a long time, but we bleed just the same, and we're taught to use the sword as a cultural touchstone. Things got very bad, very fast."

"Oh wow, now I feel like my backstory is overly simple.." Robin murmured.

Sebastian shook his head. "Just because my character has baggage doesn't mean everyone's has to."

"Anything else you'd like to mention? Appearance, notable possessions, stuff like that?"

"I carry a gnarled staff with me, and I lean heavily on it to walk. Centuries of a nomadic lifestyle do not a healthy elve make. I'm about five and a half feet tall, and I have white hair and tan skin."

"'Elve'?"

I laughed. "Elves are from _Lord of the Rings_ or whatever; elfs are where Keebler cookies come from. They're arguably distinct creatures culturally, so I differentiate them that way, and Seb liked it. I'm not great about it, though, because the rulebooks don't, so I just repeat the words on the page without thinking a lot."

Robin and Demetrius nodded, and he shrugged. "Makes sense."

"So, Elenstar, you've just finished preparing for the day, and have just put away your spellbook—or grimoire; are you a grimoire kinda guy?"

He nodded. "It's more.." He held his hands up and wiggled his fingers, completely deadpan. " _Mysterious_ ," he whispered.

Maru giggled. "You are such a nerd."

He looked at her and raised an eyebrow. "We are having family D&D night, so I'm taking that as a compliment."

" _Anyway_ , you put away your grimoire, and you're now packed and ready to go; where have you decided to go next in your search for answers?"

"The grand capital city of this nation, Edanna. I should arrive within the day."

"Excellent; I'll come back to you in a minute." Kaleb turned to Maru. "But you, you've found yourself in a spot of trouble, haven't you? You and Robin elected to have known each other in the past, and it seems that association has come back to bite you."

Maru raised her eyebrows. "Wow, just getting right into it, huh?"

"Gotta keep you on your toes." He grinned. "Don't worry, unless you guys are actively doing stupid shit, you won't die in the intro session. And this is D&D, so by and large real-world logic applies; for example, don't pick fights you know you can't win. There _is_ a skill for telling that, if they're trying to hide it, but otherwise I'll just tell you if I think you've missed something in that vein."

"So what trouble am I in?"

"Who, Maru? You seem to be fine, but we won't know about the fate of who you're playing this evening until you tell us who they are."

She stuck out her tongue at him. "Meanie. I'm a dwarven bard."

"I still cannot believe you're actually doing that, and I'm so excited to see how it turns out." He looked at Robin and Demetrius. "Bards are charisma characters. Dwarves have a natural penalty to charisma. She is playing an oxymoron; there are no charismatic dwarves, only less grumpy ones."

"You don't know that, maybe I'm really nice!"

"Are you?"

"..No, but I _could_ be."

Sebastian laughed, and his parents exchanged an incredulous glance, smiles on their faces. "Oh man, I'd forgotten what it was like to be a player and just watch all this shit happen."

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, Elenstar."

"Why are you still using his character's name?" Robin asked.

"I try to stay in the habit. It also encourages people to not distance themselves from their characters, and to not have discussions about game stuff out of character."

"Anyway." Maru swiped her hands in front of her. "I'm a dwarven bard known as Rosek the Exile; _normally_ , dwarves don't stray from their mountain homes too much, but there was an.. _incident_ , regarding a nobleman's wife."

Robin gaped. "Oh my gosh."

Kaleb smiled. "Did you duel her or seduce her, cause with bards you never know."

"The latter; I got exiled because I dueled the _nobleman_ and lost."

"I figured, it's a pretty classic bard backstory, but it's classic for a reason. So.."

* * *

The session concluded, and the group retired to their separate destinations for the night; Robin offered to let Kaleb crash on the couch, but he was eager to get home to his cat. "But Tybalt would be lonely, I've been gone _all day!_ "

After a little while, Demetrius looked over at Robin. "Hey, Robin?"

"What is it?"

"Was it just me, or was Maru making doe-eyes at Kaleb all game?"

"Did Maru not mention—I suppose I can understand her feeling strange about it.. Well, you're right, Maru _is_ making doe-eyes at Kaleb all the time, and not just during the game, either; it's because she married him in the third loop. She's been in love with him for a _long_ time, now. About eleven years, since we're a year in now, and since they got together around the end of year two in that loop."

"What?!" Demetrius was taken aback, then tilted his head thoughtfully. "..Well, I guess that makes sense, doesn't it? Loves teaching, learning, design, innovation; it's only logical that he would love her too."

"You know, the really odd part about that is that—according to her—they ended up running into each other all the time because she refused to believe I would run off with the farmer without hard evidence; but she's not a _spy_ , so she kept getting caught and making painfully awkward excuses as to why she kept ending up in the same places at the same times."

"..and he thought she was just shy and in love with him."

"She eventually found out he had adored her from the very beginning in that loop, but never made a move because he just immediately assumed she was way out of his league; his introduction to her was her test of that weird electric flash-furnace she designed."

"Didn't you say that knocked out the power grid for the entire town?"

"Yeah, he was smitten _immediately_. She said he walked up at like, nine at night, and asked what that weird box was, and she said 'a flash-furnace'—and you know Kaleb, you _know_ he had to know more—so he asked how it worked."

"Oh boy, he got a Maru infodump, didn't he?"

"Oh yeah. Apparently he hadn't had that much physics jargon thrown at him since he was majoring in it; it was the only reason he could keep up at all. He also said that she got steadily more and more excited as she went since he was still mostly keeping up, and asking questions, and that it was the cutest thing he'd ever seen."

"That's cute. I can see why he'd like that."

"There's _more_. She got done explaining, and told him she was actually about to test it; she dragged him unceremoniously behind a plexiglass pane she'd gotten as a blast shield—which was just a precaution, she told him, she was pretty sure nothing was going to happen at all—then flipped the switch. The furnace powered on, and he said the heat radiating off of it was enough to cause a shimmer in the air. She threw her fists in the air, screamed 'yes!' loud enough to scare the shit out of him, causing him to look right at her.. and then it _exploded_."

"Oh my god, were they okay?!"

"Oh, yeah, the blast shield did its job. But since he looked right at her right as it happened, he said he had a near-perfect snapshot in his mind of the moment things went wrong; she was just standing with her fists still in the air, wide-eyed, illuminated by the flash of one of her own inventions _blowing up_. She started laughing, looked over at him, shrugged, and said 'welp, time to start over.' He said that was the moment he knew she was 'the kind of person mere mortals like him could only dream of', and he said the very next was the moment he fell in love with her. Apparently something about the design caused it to push a _ton_ of power back into the local grid, and it blew the fuse on the transformer or something. So the entire town goes dark, and it's like nine at night, like I said, so the entire place goes _dark_."

Demetrius was listening intently, and Robin laughed. "And the thing that _really_ got him? Everything up to that point had been setting him up for this, but the thing that he said doomed him to forever pine from a distance was the town going dark, a slight pause while they registered what had just happened, and then a really emphatic 'Holy _shit_ ,' followed by a huff, and her muttering 'dammit Edison, if you'd just accepted that alternating current is better we wouldn't be _having_ this problem, but _noo_.'"

Demetrius laughed. "I mean, she's not wrong."

"I'll take your word for it, but my point is her being vaguely pissed off about a long-dead inventor combined with the complete lack of any apparent guilt was the thing that sealed the deal. He said he'd met a _lot_ of smart women in his life, and they were all great to be around, but _this one_ , she was virtually the definition of 'real-life mad scientist', and he was done for."

Demetrius thought about it a moment, then shook his head with a chuckle. "I hadn't thought about that, but Kaleb really does remind me of a tamer version of Gene Wilder's Dr. Frankenstein, so I can see the dynamic there."

"Oh man, the number of times I heard Maru call for him, and then hear her screech a half-second later because he darted across the room to _right behind her_ to do his Igor impersonation; they weren't even _dating_ yet, though it really seemed like they were for a long time."

Demetrius roared with laughter. "Oh, that's _priceless_!"

" _I know, right_? But that was only after he started pursuing her; once he thought she was interested, he taught himself circuitry, re-learned electromagnetism and basic mechanics, and learned the coding language Maru is using to program her robot because he wanted to be able to actually be involved with the things she was passionate about."

"That's a bit much; I feel like that may have come off as trying to make himself look good."

"Okay, but if he's smart enough to learn all that in less than a year then he's absolutely someone worthy of Maru and someone she would like, since that's not something you can _fake_ ; you're either smart enough or you're not. But no, it was pretty clear he wasn't being disingenuous; what's more, Maru actually _turned him down_ when he finally asked her out to see if he would keep coming around. He asked for a week to get himself sorted out, and then he was back like nothing happened, except for the things you'd expect after a rejection. He kept a respectful distance, I'd see him giving her melancholy looks every so often—but only when he thought no one was looking, he tried really hard not to show how disappointed he was so she wouldn't feel bad. Pretty classic signs of someone who's in love and cares more about the person they love than that love being reciprocated."

"How did that work _out_? I can't imagine he was happy that she would do that."

"Oh yeah, he was really upset. She told him after waiting two weeks, to be absolutely sure he wasn't putting up appearances. He didn't yell, or get angry, or anything like that; honestly that probably would have been easier for her to deal with. No, he just deflated with the most heartbreaking expression I've ever seen, and quietly said 'You have the right to keep yourself safe from people who would try to hurt you. I'm sorry I didn't do enough to make sure you didn't think of me as one of them. Goodnight, Maru.'"

Demetrius just stared, wide-eyed. " _Ouch_." He blinked. " _I_ feel heartbroken, and I'm only hearing about it; I'll admit I thought you were exaggerating when you said it would have been better if he'd yelled, and wrote it off, because how could him hurting our Maru like that be _better_ , but _god_."

"I know, right? It _proved_ that not only was she wrong, but that she'd pushed away someone she could _never_ replace. Her words, not mine."

"Was she okay..? Wait, you said he _married_ her, how did that get resolved..?"

"Anyone else would have holed themselves up in their room with a carton of ice cream, but the very next day she was hatching a plan to make it up to him. You know our Maru; she doesn't believe in giving up."

"What did she do?"

"She put all of her projects on hold, and wrote out a list of every nice thing she could remember him doing for her, no matter how trivial it was. Then she wrote a poem about Every. Single. One. The book was over a hundred poems long; she had it bound professionally, and mailed it to him with a letter to apologize, _begging_ him to consider giving her a chance, because she would never meet someone like him again as long as she lived, and that doing that to him was the biggest mistake she'd ever made. Again, her words, not mine."

Demetrius was speechless. "Maru.. _Our_ Maru. Wrote _poetry_? Over a _hundred_ poems?! I really hope he understood the significance."

"He got it on Monday; he showed up on Thursday with a Mermaid Pendant, and asked her to marry him." Robin laughed, tearing up a bit. "He said he would have been there Wednesday if he could have gotten the Pendant that soon; something about it not raining until Thursday. I still don't know where he got an authentic Mermaid Pendant, but by god if it didn't make a statement."

He blinked again. "Okay, good, he did understand. But wow, skipped the bouquet entirely, huh?"

"Yeah. Like I mentioned, they had only been a bouquet away from dating for a _while_ ; the only thing absent was the physical gestures of affection. He already did things like make her actually go to bed, or bring her food when she'd been working for eight hours straight. He also said upfront that he knew it was a break from tradition, and that if she wanted him to hang on to it and get a bouquet instead he would. He just knew that his mind was made up. If she was willing to write him more than hundred poems talking about how much she appreciated him, with the final poem about the greatest 'nice thing' he did for her being about _loving her_? Then he was willing to do what it took to make it work, because she was clearly willing to go the distance for him."

"That book really meant the world to him, huh?"

She nodded. "It really did. He kept it with all the things he treasured most; it was in a little wooden open top toy chest that belonged to his mother, that she'd gotten from another relative, and it was among things like the first stuffed animal he ever owned, or a black ring he said stopped wearing after a difficult part of his life. He kept it as proof of what he'd survived, he said. A few family heirlooms. Things like that." She was quiet for a little while. "We'll probably never know for sure, since Maru was never able to confirm it, and the farmer doesn't Remember any loops, but she says once heard him snap at Pam when she made some snide comment about things like poetry as sentimental gestures being 'all talk' or something like that, and that they were worthless."

Demetrius gasped. "How dare she!"

"Oh, just wait. Maru wasn't in the room, and he's not the type to yell, as you know, so we can only assume he did that thing he does where he just _radiates_ menace, because Maru heard him talking in that quiet, threatening voice—you know the one; the one he uses when someone's actually made him mad, not when he's just telling them to piss off. But she swears she heard him say 'I'd choose your next words carefully, _Pamela Douglas_ ,' to which Pam predictably scoffed, and said 'What, got your panties in a twist about that book of yours?'" Robin grinned. "He said 'I'd be careful what you call worthless, because if I had to choose between saving that book and saving your life.. _I'd have to think about it._ '"

"Oh my _god_." Demetrius was floored. "That's.. Oh _wow_ , I knew he was an intense person, but that's really.. That's honestly kind of unsettling."

"I thought so too, until I remembered that was the loop that Kaleb heard a scuffle in the trailer, saw Pam storming out, and went inside to find Penny curled into a ball, sobbing in the corner. Her arms were _covered_ in bruises—pieces of glass stuck in them too. That was more than a year prior to him threatening Pam like that, and that intervening time is why he would have had to think about it; he admitted to me that the only reason Pam went unscathed that night was because he knew he needed to get Penny to the clinic, and the rage had faded by then. He _hated_ Pam from then on, and you know he's not shy about that sort of thing."

"That's _unforgivable_." Demetrius scowled. "You mentioned that sometimes there are more differences in the loops than who the farmer ends up being friends with.. But they do all center around him, don't they? In one way or another, he's always involved. He happened to be walking by that night."

"Yeah. He's like the center of this valley's solar system."

"I want to say it's you, and before he moved here I'd say it was, but.."

"Yeah. He showed up and upended everything we knew about ourselves and each other."

"He got Sebastian and I on speaking terms. Friendly terms, even. He got me to see what I was doing was wrong, and he got Sebastian to see that even if I was going about it the wrong way, I do care about my son."

"He got you to refer to him your son, and not your stepson, or just Sebastian."

"And hopefully, he'll be okay with me calling him that, if this all goes well."

"I've never seen Sebastian this relaxed; he laughs! _Openly_! I think it'll be fine, dear. You did finish that game to be able to better understand him and talk to him, and considering the most common reference I hear from him and the farmer is 'get good'.."

"Yeah, he said that to me a couple of times. I appreciated that he explained the gaming culture context first, but _man_ that game was frustrating sometimes."

"..So you played Dark Souls, huh?" Demetrius started, looking over at the stairs, where Sebastian stood. His expression was neutral, which was a good sign, as far as Demetrius was concerned. "Favorite boss?"

" _Favorite?_ " Demetrius looked bewildered. "They _all_ sucked, how could I have a _favorite_."

"The one that was the most satisfying to beat, compared against how much you hated fighting it. The one that felt the 'best' afterwards."

"Oh, okay." He thought for a moment. "Hmm.. I'm going to have to go with O&S. I know it's an obvious pick, but big Ornstein is just.. the _worst_ , but the fight never felt _unfair_." Demetrius scowled, muttering under his breath. "Capra Demon zombie dog _bullshit_."

Sebastian snorted, a smile ghosting over his features. "The dogs suck."

"No kidding. I almost picked the Bell Gargoyles, but I don't think was a representative experience."

Sebastian raised a brow. "Did you summon Solaire and Lautrec?"

"The gold armor guy? You can _summon_ him? Why?! He kills the fire keeper!"

Sebastian looked slightly surprised. "Yeah, if you free him you can summon him for that fight, but it's finicky."

"Yeah, I beat the Gargoyles and went back and she was just dead."

"Wha—That's not—That's not normal, that's not supposed to trigger until you ring both bells."

"Oh, that explains it. I _thought_ it was really mean of them to kill her right away like that; I rang the other bell first. I got lost and fought Kellogg's first."

" _Kellogg's_?" Robin finally joined the conversation.

"Yeah, Kellogg's Breakfast Witch," Demetrius and Sebastian chorused.

"Okay, I see I'm just gonna have to play this damn thing myself, aren't I?"

Demetrius lit up. "Oh, that could be fun; Kaleb said he has a mod that can let us actually play together, instead of however the game normally handles co-op."

"No, wait, go back, are you saying you did Blighttown _first_?"

"I didn't notice you could go in the aqueduct, so I went to the Catacombs, and then the skeletons got back up, so I bailed after getting the Zweihander, and went down the elevator, and then there were ghosts, so I went through that locked door by using the master key, and then there were _drakes_ , so I ended up going through Blighttown because I could at least backstab the big club guys."

"Did Kaleb not tell you _anything_?"

"No, not really. He cleared up a few mechanics questions early on, and told me to ask for help if I got _really_ stuck, because he wishes he'd played through blind. So I did eventually ask, and it turned out I was stuck because you need the Lordvessel to go through the fog gate in the Demon Ruins—"

"You got that far without asking for help?!"

"Dark Souls is supposed to be really hard! I just assumed that was what was going on and kept trying."

"Unbelievable."

"But yeah, by the time I got back to the gargoyles I had a +4 chaos Zweihander, since you only need the chaos flame ember to do that; he _did_ tell me Vamos is in the Catacombs—but not where, finding him was.. that took a while. And I didn't really have anything _else_ to use the red titanite on."

"Okay, yeah, _not_ a representative experience."

"It _was_ really satisfying to kill the second one in two hits, though. Sure, he starts at like, two-thirds, but it was still fun. Same thing with Lautrec; oh no, your weapon can hit past shields, I keep mine on my back anyway. He snorted. "Also good luck trying to power through the Zweihander's heavy attack."

"..Alright. I'll admit I was skeptical you'd actually played it, but everything you've said checks out, and a lot of it isn't stuff you could easily find online, like the fact that Lautrec's weapon can ignore shields, or that you can make a chaos weapon with only the chaos ember."

"Yeah I actually had to go _back_ for the large ember; that's when I fought the Capra Demon, and why it was so frustrating, cause I knew if I could just _hit_ the damn thing it would die, I'd already _fought_ them in the Demon Ruins."

"The dogs suck." Sebastian nodded sagely.

"They _really_ do." Demetrius slapped a fist into his upturned palm. "Oh, Kaleb said the three of us should play Dark Souls 3, since it apparently has good matchmaking."

Sebastian paused. "..Yeah. That could be a lot of fun."

* * *

"Hey, Kaleb. You busy?"

Kaleb paused at the sound of Maru's voice, hand on the doorknob to his shed. "Not.. particularly, no."

She smirked, raising a brow. "So, yes; but you'll drop what you're doing depending on what I ask."

He nodded, keeping a straight face. "Yeah, that one. I like that one." She wasn't sure if he was joking or not; knowing him, though, the answer could very well be 'both'.

Maru nodded back, matching his level expression. "Cool; I want you to take me to dinner."

He started, and she resisted the urge to laugh. She didn't want to make him think she was joking, or something like that. She knew Kaleb by now, and she knew she needed to spell it out for him, otherwise he'd perpetually assume he was misreading her signals because he wasn't good enough, or something. "Wha—why _me_?"

Yeah, see? Like _that_.

"Because I like you, and I want to spend more time with you, and maybe I'm hoping you'll kiss me at the end." Maru shrugged easily.

"So this is like, a _date_ ," he said cautiously.

"Yes, that is what I am suggesting."

"I—hell yeah." He laughed once in disbelief. "You're _so_ far out of my league, but hell yeah."

She cocked an eyebrow. "Don't put yourself down. I value your talents just like you value mine."

"I—" He stopped, blinking owlishly. "..huh. I was not prepared for _that_ to be your counter argument."

Maru couldn't hold back the smirk that crept onto her features. "Good. So; meet at seven?"

"..meet at seven," he confirmed, then looked up suddenly. "Wait I know nothing about dating around here where do we even _go_ ," he blurted.

"You could always just cook me dinner; that's romantic, right?" She stopped, laughing once. "..I guess _I'm_ the one asking _you_ to take me on a date, so scratch the question portion; that _is_ in fact the sort of romantic I'm looking for."

"I know how to make like, _one_ thing well." He shifted nervously, clearly hoping that fact wasn't a deal-breaker, but also unwilling to not be upfront about it.

"What is it?" She knew, of course, but appearances had to be kept.

"Chili; it's a family recipe. I like to _think_ I'm pretty good at it."

She beamed, and cheered internally at the faint blush on his cheeks. "Ooh, that sounds really good!"

"..How are you with spicy food?"

"Pretty good." Oh, you know, she'd only developed her tolerance eating _this exact dish_.

He nodded slowly. "..Alright. Chili at my place at seven?"

Her grin relaxed to a gentle, warm smile. "I'll be there, Kaleb."

There was a long pause.

"Shit I need to go to Pierre's before he closes!" Kaleb dashed away towards town, leaving behind a quietly giggling Maru.

"..He's so earnest."

* * *

"Thish is _really_ good," Maru said, pointing at the bowl with her spoon. She was also talking with her mouth full, because she wasn't going to let _complimenting_ his cooking stop her from _eating_ said cooking. Plus she knew he thought it was cute.

Kaleb smiled. "Thanks. The produce here is better, so it's not quite the flavor profile I was expecting, my balance was off with my spices, but hey. Always next time, right?"

"You _better_ invite me; I'm like, _invested_ now."

He turned bright red. "Never had someone say they were invested in my chili recipe before.." He mumbled.

"Well, now you have. You shaid 'your recipe' this time," she swallowed before continuing, "what's different about yours?"

"Well, for starters, we—my family and I—all have our own spice choices. I lean more heavily on things like cayenne and oregano, but grandma's has basil, and she uses chili powder instead of cayenne, if memory serves. I don't measure things, like.. _at all_ , either. It's portioned to make use of like, 'half an onion' or stuff like that, or a whole can of sauce." He shrugged. "But the actual like, _thing_ I added was when browning the meat, when you add the onion, also add a can of beer, preferably something like a red ale, but even a lager will work if that's all I've got. The red ale is for flavor, but the primary function is it causes the beef to effectively disintegrate, turning it into more of a meat sauce that is then the vessel for the other stuff. The diced tomatoes were mom's addition."

She giggled. "You're pretty into this."

"I know how to cook one thing, so I better do it well—" He cut off, tilting his head from side to side. "Okay, amendment, I _can_ cook, I just don't, usually."

"Why not?"

He shrugged again. "For a long time it was because I was always around other people who were really _good_. Why would _I_ cook? They like doing it, and it's amazing."

She nodded. "Yeah, I get that. I think dad's the best cook in our family. Though mom's pretty good too."

"What about you?"

"I've learned a thing or two over the years." Many years more than he realized, and a lot of which she learned from him.

He smiled faintly, raising a brow. "I can't tell if you're selling yourself short, or just being cagey and or modest."

Maru smirked. "Guess you'll just have to let me cook for you and find out."

".. _Damn_ , that was a good line."

She winked. "I know what I'm about."

"Well, thank god for that; I'm not gonna turn down free food, so yeah, I'm in."

"Awesome!" She did a little fist pump, then smirked again. "Gotta get that second date somehow."

"As if I needed convincing," he muttered, smiling to himself.

"Hm? Did you say something?" She dramatically held a hand to her ear. "It almost sounded like 'but Maru, all you have to do is ask'."

He snorted. "Hey now, that is _heavily_ paraphrased."

"But the meaning is still maintained," she challenged.

He blinked. "..I feel like I am being very aggressively courted."

"That is _exactly_ what is happening." She tilted her head innocently. "Is it working?"

"Oh, shit, this is a much more serious date than I thought.." he murmured, then looked down with a frown. "Damn, I shoulda worn a nicer shirt.."

"It _is_ your house, you could always change." She winked. "I promise I won't stare _too_ much."

"What is even _happening_ in my life right now," he laughed, shaking his head, and she realized he was genuinely floundering a bit.

Maru sobered. "Sorry; I can ease off if you like, I just.. I really like you, and I know how much you appreciate being extra."

"Wait, the exaggerated banter was actually for _my_ benefit?"

"Yeah, kinda."

He was quiet a moment. "..stick to heartfelt, for now. I still feel like this isn't real, and I used that kind of banter as a shield for a long time, so unless it's an established relationship that can be how it gets parsed."

"Oh, I'm sorry!" She shook her head. "Let me start over then; you can wear a nice shirt if you want to, but you cooked me dinner, and it was really good, to boot. As far as I'm concerned, you've earned _more_ than a second date. But since _I'm_ courting _you_ , it's me that needs to earn a second date."

"No, that's.. I still maintain you're out of my league, I'll keep spending time with you as long as you'll let me."

"Well.." She shot him a crooked smile. "Do you wanna watch a movie or something? I'd _also_ like to spend more time together."

"I'd love to, but it'd be way too late to get you home if we did that."

"Aw, damn, you figured me out." She grinned. "But seriously; would me not making it back tonight really be that bad?"

He blinked, then let out a laugh. "Wow, this is a hell of a first date."

"It'd be the second, we're watching a movie, remember?" She pointed out.

"I.. don't think that's quite how that works."

She shrugged easily. "Well, I guess I'll just have to be a floozy for the night."

"That's not—I didn't mean—" He cut off, laughing. "..you're fucking with me, aren't you?"

"Oh, no, I'm absolutely going to sleep with you if you let me," she informed him.

Kaleb made a strangled noise. "Wha—why?!"

"Because I think you're a great guy, and I like you, and you're hot? Seems pretty straightforward to me."

He smiled faintly, tilting his head in a sort of scooping motion—and Maru couldn't help but smile at the familiar sight. "..alright, I guess I'm getting laid tonight."

" _Yes_!" She did a little happy dance. "I wasn't sure if you'd be okay with it, but I was hoping."

"I see, the movie was really just Netflix and chill," he teased.

"I mean, not originally, but it can be if you want.."

"..yeah. Yeah, you know what, if a brilliant, beautiful woman is gonna throw herself at me, by god I'm gonna catch her." He paused. "Wait if you're staying the night I _actually_ want to watch a movie, because I want to have a cheesy romantic movie night, and then we can go from there."

" _Swoon_." She stood up, pausing with her arms crossed, loosely grasping her shirt at the waist. "Just to be extra clear, you _are_ interested in me?"

"If you're about to take your shirt off, I cannot be held responsible for how insufferable horny Kaleb is; but I _did_ just say I _actually_ wanted to watch that movie."

She whipped her shirt off. "I know; but if we're gonna go full hallmark movie I want to wear an oversized boyfriend shirt." She unhooked her bra, tossing it off to the side with the rest of her stuff. "I'll need it to sleep in anyway, I didn't exactly bring sleepover stuff; I didn't want to pressure you."

Kaleb was trying very hard not to stare. "That's. That's nice of you; you uh.. didn't have to do that here, not that I'm like, _complaining_."

"I'd be lying if I said I wasn't showing off a little." She winked. "Like a little sneak preview. Plus I like what I've seen of bashful Kaleb, he's cute. Where should I go to retrieve a shirt?"

He thought a moment, and much to her surprise, elected to pull his own shirt off and toss it to her. "It's one of the softer ones I have."

She caught it, but didn't take her eyes off him. She bit her lip. "Turnabout is fair play, I see."

"That too." He stood, walking to his bedroom. "I'm gonna grab sweatpants, you want a pair?"

"Are you making me wear pants to bed? How dare you," she deadpanned.

"I meant for the movie, smartass; I'd assumed if you wanted the boyfriend shirt it was a no pants kinda situation."

"Nah, that's what blankets and boyfriends are for." She paused. "It's okay that I'm calling you that, right..?"

He poked his head out of the door to his bedroom, confused. "Are we.. _not_ dating now? I'd be disappointed if you _didn't_ call me that."

She beamed. "Oh, good!" She shucked her pants after he went back into his room, and curled up under a blanket on the couch.

He came back, then paused, looking at her suspiciously. "I'm trying to decide if you're wearing pants. And also whether I want to be right or not, because on the one hand, the smug satisfaction of being right, but on the other, Maru without pants on."

She raised a brow. "You think I'm wearing pants? I _just_ said I wasn't going to be."

"Yeah, but you also like fucking with me, so." He shrugged.

She giggled. "Fair. Come find out, hotshot."

He halted for a brief moment, before continuing to get things set up. "Mm; don't call me that."

"O-Oh, sorry." She shrank in on herself slightly.

..Looks like she got a little overconfident.

"Amendment: don't call me that until movie night's over, because there is an unbelievable amount of sexual tension in the sentence 'come find out, hotshot.'" He pulled up the movie on his laptop.

She barked out a laugh. "Oh! Got it, go-to 'come fuck me' nickname established."

"I—are you anticipating _needing_ that?"

She shrugged with a fond smile. "Yeah, because you're dense as shit, and I want to have a signal I can use that's not possible to mistake for something else."

"So basically what just happened is 'hotshot' is now my hooker name," he quipped.

"Oh my _god_ ," Maru cackled. "Absolutely _not_ , you are _mine_."

Kaleb's breath hitched. "Oh fuck," he murmured.

She clapped her hands over her mouth. "Oh god I'm so sorry..!"

He shook his head, cheeks still red. "I am very much okay with that, don't worry, I was just reeling from the experience of someone like _you_ claiming they want me so adamantly."

"Oh, phew.."

"Yeah, no, feel free to be as possessive as you want in the realm of romantic declarations, as long as you don't try to like, control my behavior we're good."

"In that case.." She looked him in the eyes. "I want you, Kaleb, and I'm not letting anyone else have you if I get my way."

He let out a groan. "Jesus can you stop being _unbearably_ sexy for like, just two hours, so we can have a cute movie night, you can go back to lighting me up afterwards, I'd love that, but _god_."

"Well, I'm not doing it on _purpose_ , since you said you'd prefer heartfelt, so.. no promises."

He plopped down, slipping under the blanket and running a hand along her thigh. "Alright, that's fair, I suppose."

She shot him an amused smirk. "Wasting no time feeling up my legs, I see."

"I have nothing to apologize for, your legs are great. Though you know what they say; thighs are great hand warmers, but they're better ear warmers."

She stared in amazement. "That was smooth as hell."

"Glad you think so." An upbeat big band number began to play. "Oh, it's starting." He slipped an arm around her, pulling her into his side to rest against him.

"Oh wow, really putting the moves on—" She cut off in confusion as the scene progressed. "Wait.. Is that a toy store? ..Why are they robbing a _toy store_ —ohhh."

Kaleb smiled to himself, holding her a little tighter. "Oh, this is gonna be a good time."

"Sorry.."

"What?! No, dead serious, that was adorable; you're making all my cute movie date dreams come true right now."

She gawked at the screen. " _Why is your phone not on silent!?_ You are in the _middle of a burglary!_ "

"Ah, Rusty; that guy's name is Rusty, by the way."

* * *

The credits began to play, and Maru bobbed her head gently side to side in time. "This is a fun little tune."

"Right? The whole soundtrack for this movie is great."

There was a pause. "Do you wanna make out while the credits roll? That feels like a box we should tick for the sake of being a cheesy hallmark movie."

Kaleb slipped a hand under the hem of her shirt to lay flat on her stomach. "Oh yeah, definitely; but while hallmark movies are great, I mostly want to because I want _you_." He pressed a few feather light kisses to her neck.

"Ohh, this is really nice.." She snuggled closer. "Keep doing that.."

"Don't have to tell me twice," he murmured.

* * *

"Did you stay with Kaleb last night?"

"Mhmm. It was great." Maru let out a dreamy sigh. "..god, I'd missed him so much.."

The tension in the room dissolved. "I guess I can't blame you, we're all just envious since this is the first time one of us has dated him a second time." Leah leaned back with a sigh or her own, though her was much more resigned. "Damn. I was hoping I'd have another shot this loop."

Haley raised a brow. "How'd that even happen, anyway? What prompted you guys to get together?"

"Dad noticed I was 'making doe-eyes' at him during the family D&D game the first night, and when he asked mom she told him my story about how we got married the first time, and how we met; you know how Kaleb helped dad reconcile with Seb this time around?"

There was a collective nod. "It's a very sweet story." Emily sighed happily.

"Seb is so much happier, too. He actually smiled while talking about the game. _Smiled_! About _Demetrius_!"

Haley sighed airily. "Such is the charm of our mysterious farmer."

Abigail snorted. "Yeah, if being a fuckin' nerd counts as mysterious."

Maru giggled. "Well, they still hang out sometimes, and dad asked a few leading questions to figure out if Kaleb liked me that way, and he was super cagey, cause it's my _dad_ , you know, so he was worried about upsetting him, I guess. At that point apparently dad just outright told him 'I don't know if it's _just_ the game, but you seem happier at game night, and I think it's because Maru's around. You helped me reconcile with my son; it's okay, Kaleb, I know you wouldn't mean her—or any of us—any harm,' and _then_ Kaleb finally admitted he liked me, but that he was too intimidated to ask me on a date, because he didn't feel like he deserved someone like me."

"I can't stand how self-deprecating that boy is." Emily frowned. "I wish we could all just tell him 'Kaleb! We literally all fell in love with you, and you're a fantastic person! Stop being all down on yourself!'"

"So you asked him, then?" Abigail asked.

Maru ducked her head. "I know we said we weren't going to make any active moves to win him over, but in my defense, I _was_ told he was interested, and that the only thing stopping him was his own self-doubt."

Abigail sighed, shaking her head. "I know, that's why I'm not upset. Also, I've been thinking about that; I know it was my idea, but it occurred to me that our go-to attitude and tendency to chase after what we want with everything we've got are key reasons he likes Maru and I. It's pretty central to our appeal as romantic candidates. I wasn't going to say anything—it felt too self-serving—but then I realized it's a huge handicap for Maru, too."

Haley, surprisingly, chimed in affirmatively. "As much as I want to tell you two to not swoop in and snatch him up before we have a chance to, I can't deny that you're right. And at the end of the day, the farmer is going to want who he wants based on the starting conditions of the loop. Sometimes he's going to want to be swept off his feet, and sometimes he's going to want to achieve his potential." She gestured to Abigail, then Maru, respectively. She looked at Emily and Leah in turn. "Sometimes he's going to want to be loved sweetly and unconditionally; and sometimes he's going to want to live his life free from the 'usual' rules he's been bound to, and have someone to share that freedom with who understands the artistry in his soul." Haley sighed. "I just wish I could figure out how _I_ fit in to this."

Emily was quiet a moment. "Sometimes he wants someone that he can feel hurt alongside, and know that they aren't pitying him. But as we go, and the longer we do this.."

"The more I grow up, and the less appealing I become. I know."

"Haley, that's not.. I mean, you are growing up, but it doesn't make you less _appealing_ ," Leah protested.

"I'm fabulous, and I haven't forgotten it." Haley flipped her hair, eliciting a laugh from the group. "But I am less appealing _to him_." She was quiet a moment. "And.. that's okay. He wouldn't have the heart to tell me if we had been together the whole time, and our marriage would.. fall apart. Because he would _want_ to love me the way I love him; but he wouldn't be able to."

" _Damn_ , Haley." Abigail held out her arms. "You want a hug? That was some heavy shit."

"No, but I will accept ice cream."

Abigail stood. "Deal. We're not kids anymore, but goddamn if you don't deserve something for that, that was. Wow. I mean this as genuinely as possible; I'm proud of you, that's.. not an easy thing to come to terms with."

"..thanks. It.. had to happen. We wouldn't have been happy, in the long run, I think. Maybe I'm wrong; I _hope_ I'm wrong. But I can't do that to him." She took a deep breath, nodding. "Or to me. I deserve better than to love someone who can't love me back, no matter how great I think he is."

" _Haley_ ~!" Emily squealed. "You're so grown up!"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm great, I know." Emily looked a little hurt, and Haley gave her a small smile. "Come on, sis, I can only handle so much vulnerability at once, give me a break."

Emily perked back up. "Okay. Have fun, you two!"

Abigail and Haley left, leaving just the other three. There was a moment of silence, before Leah sighed. "..I'll be honest, Maru; while I don't think you did anything wrong, I'm still upset with you. That's not really reasonable of me, but.."

"No, let's not play that game. What's on your mind, Leah? We've been at this for nine and twelve years, respectively; twelve and fifteen if you count our 'original' loops. I think we're mature enough to have an honest discussion. Talk to me."

Emily nodded. "We have to be open. I don't want any more cat fights behind the scenes." She winced. "I'm sorry about that, by the way."

"It's alright; there was a lot of unaired baggage between you two, and you literally couldn't say anything to her. That tension had to go somewhere. I was mad then, but I'm not now." Leah smiled.

"And that's why I'm willing to hear you out, Leah. I know you're just in tune with your feelings; not _hysterical_ , or whatever some jerks would call it."

"Thanks, Maru. I guess.. I'm just envious that you got to _marry_ him, and now you get to date him _again_ ; and given you know what's up there in his mind ahead of time, so you already know he's right for you, I'm assuming you're planning on proposing as soon as it's not weird."

"That.. was the plan, yeah," Maru admitted. "I learned my lesson. If he wants me, he can _have_ me, because I sure as hell want _him_."

"And you know what? I'll drink to that." Leah stood, walking to her cabinet. "I have cider and wine; you two want anything?"

"Wine," Emily chirped. "Cider doesn't agree with me, sadly."

Maru looked at her in surprise. "Really? I didn't know that."

She nodded sadly. "Kaleb was crushed; you know how much he loves cider."

"Boy do I." Leah looked at Maru. "You?"

"Pass; if I drink with you guys I'll end up drinking too much to be sober for a test-run I want to do later today."

"I can respect that." Leah retrieved a bottle of wine and two glasses. "I'm a wine girl, as you know, so don't feel like I opened a bottle 'just for you'; I know you'd feel guilty about it."

"You're right, I would." Emily ducked her head. "Thanks, Leah."

Leah just laughed. "It's in my house for a reason, after all." She poured Emily a glass, then herself, holding hers up. "Cheers."

"Indeed!"

Leah set the bottle aside, looking back at Maru. "But yeah. That's my two cents. I'm happy for you, and I'm happy you're exercising your right to choose happiness, but it doesn't make me not upset about the fact that _you_ choosing happiness means _I_ can't. And because that sounded really defeatist, let me clarify; I know I'll meet someone else eventually. But I've seen these three years play out a few times now, so I know it'll be after the loops, and who _knows_ how long that'll be."

They all sat a moment, sadly contemplating this. "Well, at least we're looping here, in a place like Pelican Town. I can't imagine doing this somewhere I didn't love dearly like this." Emily smiled, trying to lighten the mood.

"Yeah, the anonymity of a city is only good if you're willing to do things that would normally have consequences; you could outrun them there, but not here. But none of us would anyway, so.." Leah shrugged.

"Except—ironically—Kaleb." The other two stared at Maru. "What? You can't tell me you haven't noticed that he has a vicious streak a mile wide."

"I'm.. surprised to hear you say that so calmly," Leah said slowly, and Emily nodded.

"Why wouldn't I? It's not like he would ever hurt one of us, and it's not like he would ever do something that qualifies as 'vicious' unprovoked anyway."

"I suppose, I just.. I don't see him that way," Emily murmured. "He was always so gentle and happy with me, or neutrally sad at worst. His energy is.. kind."

Leah shrugged. "I never said he wasn't. But to me his 'energy' is loyal; to a fault. You guys remember the incident with Kel."

Maru frowned. "Yeah.. sometimes it's hard to believe he has that in him, but I know it is; the loops are all different, but he's still _him_."

Emily nodded. "He's got a lot going on up in his head."

Maru nodded along with her. "But yeah. I can absolutely see the him from some of his wilder loops joining some kind of underground anarchist vigilante group or something."

"Ohh, I thought you meant like.. hurting people, or like.. just being a bad person, which.." Emily frowned, clearly displeased with the idea.

"No, no. Well.. if he was stuck in the city, actually, maybe. He does so well because he loves it here and we support him. Without that.. I don't know. Maybe, maybe not. I don't want to think he could be a bad person, but.. I know the potential exists, by his own admission."

* * *

"..hey, Maru?"

She looked over with a gentle smile. "What's up?"

"I.. well, you've been hanging out here a lot, and I love having you around, so.. I, uh.."

She tilted her head curiously.

"I.." He deflated slightly. "..nevermind. Just.. wanted to tell you I love you."

"Kaleb." She gave him a gently admonishing look. "You're not shy about telling me you love me, I _know_ that's not what you were going to say; I love you too, though."

"I'm just.. nervous, I guess.."

"Why?"

He didn't make eye contact. "I can't say without giving it away.."

She turned to face him completely. "You can tell me, love. I promise."

"Would you.. would you like to move in..?" He ventured, peeking over at her in a way that made her heart clench. "You're already here a lot of the time, and most of your recent projects are in my work shed anyway.."

Maru gasped, then jumped to her feet with a blinding smile. "Let me go pack!"

He blinked, cheeks flushed. "O-Oh, I didn't expect you to be that excited."

"I've been _hoping_ you'd ask, for a while now, actually. I just didn't want to pressure you."

He was dumbfounded. "..really?"

"Yes, really!" She laughed. "Is this really so surprising coming from the girl who showed up and practically demanded you cook her dinner?"

"..I guess not." He smiled slowly, cheeks reddening. "Well.. I guess this is your home too, now."

"Oh, sweetie.." Maru smiled gently. "My home has been where you are for a _long_ time."

* * *

Maru felt a weight in her chest; at midnight tonight.. Kaleb wouldn't be her husband anymore. She held him tighter, and he gave her a slightly confused look out of the corner of his eye. "You alright there, hon? Something on your mind?"

"Just.. I love you. So much. I like being with you, and times like new years make me sentimental, I guess." She let out a soft sigh. "I just want to be close to you right now, I guess."

"Anything I can do?" He looked at her with a gentle smile, and she felt her face flush.

"..Me?" She joked.

..Or maybe it wasn't a joke, but you can't prove anything.

He blinked, then snorted with an amused smile. "I'm _pretty_ sure you're messing with me, but if you're not, sure, I'm in. Hell of a way to ring in the new year, if you ask me."

She stood wordlessly, dragging him off to their bedroom.

..She was going to be _so_ frustrated at the start of the next loop.

And as she laid in her bed at home, three years earlier once again, face red and heart racing, she had only one thought:

_Worth it._


	2. Dark Souls and D&D Excerpts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: the working title for the D&D loop was D&D(ANK Souls).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have some fun shenanigans about Demetrius playing Dark Souls and about the Jacobs family playing D&D each one begins with the last line of the scene it was cut from, so you don't have to re-read those bits, but you can still tell where the scenes go. They _are_ in chronological order.

Kaleb thrust his fists in the air. "One of us! One of us!"

"What?!"

"If you're smiling after that, you're going to fucking _love_ this game, I'm absolutely blown away you got this far, and the reason you're stuck is because you're supposed to fight.. Actually, for perspective, after Kellogg's and the Gargoyles, you go through Sen's Fortress, fight the Iron Golem, deal with the chapel, then the Archers, then fight O&S, _then_ you come back and go one of four places; one of those places is where you're standing _right now_ but you obviously had to fight Ceaseless to get here. And I'm assuming you actually fought him?"

"Yeah, was I not supposed to?"

"You _can_ , just don't get hit."

"Yeah, I _noticed_ that."

"If you grab the armor set at the back of the boss arena, then book it back to the boss fog, he follows you—which he normally won't do—and falls off the cliff and just fucking dies."

He stared at me in astonishment. " _What_."

"Fun fact: I have literally _never_ beaten him the 'real' way. Congratulations; you're arguably as good at or better at Dark Souls than I am."

"I don't know about _that_."

"I mean, I've got experience, but you've obviously got the skills, my man." I shook my head. "Anyway, go back to Firelink, where you started; there's a third path you apparently missed, you can go in the aqueduct."

He sighed. "I didn't think it would be something like that, I just knew I had never played games, and that it was supposed to be really hard, so I just kept trying."

"My friend did something similar. He spent _three hours_ on the Asylum Demon the first time it shows up trying to _punch it to death_."

"There's a second time?"

"..Ah. You started as the Thief, and took Black Firebombs."

"How—I missed something again, didn't I?"

"..Do you have the Bandit's Knife?"

"No?"

"Jesus, you don't even have your starting weapon, this is absolutely incredible; what did you even _fight_ with?!"

"Well, I found a morningstar in a chest, and it said I didn't have enough stats, but that I could use it in two hands, so I just leveled up strength twice and went from there, and the skeletons up top don't get back up, so I got the Zweihander from there, and I guess I just thought 'cool, it's really big so I can hit things from farther away, and it does a lot more damage', so I leveled up strength more until I could two-hand _that,_ and then I just leveled endurance so I could actually wear armor, and it increases stamina. Is it just because I'm new, or is endurance just.. better than the other stats?"

Kaleb stared at him in amazement. "And you don't even have the Grass Crest Shield, unbelievable.. Yeah, endurance is king. Level it to forty, that's when it stops giving you stamina. I cannot believe you _accidentally_ did the Zweihander build."

"Build?"

"There are certain ways of playing, the way you allocate your stats and what weapons and armor and rings you use is usually called your 'build'. It's the way you 'built' up your character. Some builds are really good, and become known by name; the Zweihander build is _infamous_ , because the Zweihander has a ridiculous amount of stagger, so in PvP—Player versus Player—you could just stunlock people to death because of how much damage the damn thing does; and you needed almost no stats to do it, cause like you noticed, it has a really high base damage compared to its stat requirements. You accidentally made one of the better builds in the entire game, and you don't even have two of the pieces—which you can actually get to _right now_ , by the way, have fun tracking those down. I mentioned one by name, the other is a ring, and they're in the same area. It'll be pretty obvious when you find it."

"Is the Chloranthy Ring not the one you're talking about?"

"..Of _course_ you have that; you _do_ have access to it, I guess—dear god, man, that's a secret area, technically, the Great Hollow is entirely optional." Kaleb shook his head. "No, I'm talking about the ring that increases your equip load by _fifty percent_."

His mouth fell open. "That would have been nice."

"Yeah, no kidding. Wait, are you fast rolling?"

"How do I tell?"

"Roll, I can just tell." He did so, and Kaleb nodded. "Okay, cool. I figured, cause I don't know _how_ you could have gotten this far if you weren't."

"Alright, so go back?"

"Go back. Have fun trying not to die on the Waterwheel of Death."

"The hamster wheel elevator?"

"Yeah, that. It's really jank, because it's an old game."

"I noticed."

"Well, let me know if you get really stuck on a boss and I'll run a character up and you can summon me."

"..Summon?"

" _FUCK, YOU HAVEN'T MET SOLAIRE_." Kaleb laid his face in his palms. "I am _so sorry_ , this game has a co-op feature."

"That.. would have been nice, yes."

"If it helps, the only summon you could have used by this point offline is Mildred, and while she kicks ass, you have to beat her as an invader first, and if you don't know how her moveset works that can be _dicey_."

"Invader?"

"If you can summon, you can be invaded. You have to be online to be invaded by other players, but there are NPC invaders here and there that will invade even offline. Normally you have to be online to co-op with other players, but it's possible to circumvent that by using a third-party tool to add people to your IP pool manually—the game just kinda grabs twenty other players and chucks them in there with no foresight as to whether you're even in level range, or the same area, so this guy made a mod to make co-op not _impossible_."

"How will I know if I get invaded?"

"A big banner message pops up saying you were invaded by so-and-so."

"Alright, well, I'll let you know if I need help again."

"Cool."

* * *

"You told me I can throw lightning; I'm a faith build now." Demetrius deadpanned.

"A man after my own heart. I was a faith build from the get-go, but only because I had help. You have the strength to two-hand it, but you'll need twenty-four dexterity. There's actually no faith requirement, believe it or not, but it's _way_ less good without a decent faith."

"So get the dex first, and go from there."

"Hey, you're getting the lingo! Yes, that's a good plan. I know you have at least fifteen, cause you're the thief."

"I _still_ have fifteen; I've been leaning on the base damage of the Zweihander and the stamina regeneration from the shield and the ring."

"Ooh, that good, good stamina regen. Yeah, that's a _solid_ build, honestly. The spear is cool, but I'm honestly not sure if it'll be _better_."

"Worst case I have a little extra dex to try out weapons I find, and I'm getting the faith for the lightning miracle anyway, so."

"Hell yeah. So you killed O&S, where are you now?"

"Demon Ruins, since I could warp right back there."

"Good luck, that place is, uh.. Yeah. Let me know when you get to the Bed of Chaos. That's not a real boss, if you ask me; it's a gimmick and I _hate_ it. Feel free to try it if you want, just know going in it's a really weird thing that kinda has its own rules."

"Hey, I do have a question; I found an ember in this area that Andre won't take, and neither will the magic guy. Is there a third blacksmith?"

"Yeah, Vamos. He's in the Catacombs; I'm telling you because I'm willing to bet it'll _still_ take a while to find him, even knowing what area he's in. It's a bitch to get to. He turns +5 weapons into +0 to 5 fire by default, then from +5 fire to either +6 to 10 fire if you give him the large flame ember, or to +0 to 5 chaos if you give him the chaos flame ember. Which one did you get?"

"The one in the Demon Ruins."

"My question stands, they're _both_ in the Demon ruins."

"Oh, uh.. I ran into some lava and grabbed it and then died, which I expected."

"Chaos ember. That's the one that scales with humanity; the number by your health. It caps at ten, I think. Having humanity also increases your defense, but obviously if you die you lose it."

"Hmm. That.. sounds really useful, actually. I noticed the defense, but it didn't feel worth it to worry too much about it, since it's kind of a pain to get, but if it bolsters my damage too, then I don't need stats for weapon damage, and I can put them in faith for lightning damage."

"..Are—are you making a _Chaos Zweihander_." Kaleb was barely restraining himself from laughing.

"I was considering it; is it not a good idea?"

"It's completely viable."

"Then why are you laughing?"

"I don't want to tell you right now; it's a community thing, and if you know it and laugh when I reference it around you, it'll give the whole thing away because I reference it to Sebastian sometimes."

"Won't I already get it?"

"It's a video, so no; you just need to have played Dark Souls for the video to be funny."

"Ah. Is the Chaos Zweihander a meme of some variety?"

"Sort of; it's more that it's actually _really good_ , because you only technically need sixteen strength and ten dexterity, so almost all of your stats can go into endurance and vitality, _or_ in PvP you can fight people who are much lower level than you would normally be at that level of effectiveness."

"That just sounds mean."

"Like, ninety percent of the Dark Souls culture revolves around PvP, and being a dick is just kinda part of the experience. My friends and I used to hang out in a really common PvP area; two summons and the host, and when the invaders showed up—they always show up in the same place—one guy would do the bow gesture, and if they bowed back we'd duke it out normally. If they attacked him while he was bowing, taking advantage of the fact that you can't cancel gestures, they'd find out that I was actually standing _behind their camera_ , and I would backstab them if I could manage it. If I didn't, our third guy was behind the host, disguised as a big urn with the chameleon spell. Thing is, aiming a bow doesn't break the spell. Or a greatbow, which knocks you down. So if they turned to fight _me_ , he'd shoot them in the back and I'd backstab them the second they got up. If they didn't, and tried to block the arrow, I just backstabbed them anyway. It was a fucking _vicious_ setup. It was a blast, cause if they killed the first guy—the host—fast enough, that was it, they win. That's why we had him be the bait, to actually make it somewhat fair."

"That does _not_ sound fair."

"I said _somewhat_ , and like I said, if they bowed we would usually just let them fight the host. Unless we recognized their name and knew they were a jerk."

"I suppose that is fairly in-character for you."

He grinned. "Yep. Glad we understand each other."

* * *

"It really is like that sometimes," Kaleb laughed. "Okay, so I use three-point-five, which is the update to 3rd edition; the most recent is 5th, but I learned on three-five—I call it that for brevity—and I'm way more familiar with the content, and the balance. It means I can make way more stuff up without accidentally wrecking the game balance. Plus there's a _lot_ of content, which can be overwhelming, but it also means characters feel unique a lot more often."

"..Oh, that could be fun."

"What could?"

Demetrius grinned. "..How hard would it be to make Solaire into a character?"

"I don't _care_ how hard it is, I will _make it happen_."

He blinked in surprise, smiling. "Alright then. I take it this is something you've always wanted to do?"

"I've never really thought about it, but with the goal here—bonding with Sebastian, sharing D&D as a family—and with how much you like and identify with Solaire? Maybe it won't work out as well as I'm hoping, but if it does.." Kaleb let out a low whistle. "I will be telling stories about this campaign in hole-in-the-wall game stores until I _die_."

"Alright; what do you need me to do?"

Kaleb walked over to the laptop Demetrius had been using, tabbing out of Dark Souls. "First: read this." He opened a .pdf file.

"Did you know I would need that?"

"No, it's just all still on here from when this was my main laptop. This is a sort of cut-down reference sheet on the basic stuff you need to know during actual gameplay; it's by no means enough to actually _make_ a character, but it'll give you an idea of the sorts of things you can build for. There are six stats: Strength, Dex, Con—short for constitution, it's vitality in Dark Souls, Intelligence—int for short, Wisdom—faith, wis for short, and Charisma. That one's a little wonky, because of the way spellcasting works. Essentially, miracles and sorceries don't mix. Some sorcery characters—not sorcerer, that's an actual class—use int, some use charisma. All divine casters—miracle users—use wisdom. At least the normal ones do. With me so far?"

"So I'll need a high wisdom score."

"Yes, absolutely. It _will_ be your highest stat. 'S just how it is. Oh, okay, actually, not _strictly_ true; Paladins and Rangers _get_ spells, but they're more of a supporting class feature rather than being their _thing_ , so they don't need a super high wisdom."

"What classes use wisdom?"

"Clerics, and Druids. I'm sticking to base classes for now; there are a few others, but none come to mind that would be better than 'Sun domain Cleric'."

"That does sound rather ideal."

Kaleb paused. "Mm; scratch that. Favored soul. It's one of the few divine classes that uses Charisma; this is relevant because turning undead is based on Charisma, specifically the number of uses; I'm _probably_ going to end up balancing your lightning spear by having it consume a use of turn undead. I'll get back to you on that. So Charisma might actually be your highest; and hey, that way you won't have to worry about dialing back the charm."

Kaleb grinned, and Demetrius rolled his eyes with a smile. "I forget how much of a flatterer you are sometimes."

"Hey now, don't sell yourself short, you're a very charming guy."

"And what gave you that idea?"

Kaleb's grin turned mischievous. "Well, Maru's pretty smooth when she wants to be, and she had to have gotten it from _somewhere_ ; and let's be honest, 'suave' is not a word I would generally attribute to Robin. 'Brash', perhaps, or 'confident', but subtlety is not her strong suit. You know what they say about 'when all you have is a hammer', and she _is_ a carpenter.."

Demetrius threw his head back and laughed. "For both our sake, I won't tell her you said that, but you may have a point there."

* * *

"I figured, it's a pretty classic bard backstory, but it's classic for a reason." Kaleb turned the conversation back to the matter at hand. "So; in your exodus, you teamed up with a daring warrior; but one who had a tendency to punch first and ask questions later. Now a pair of the scoundrels and ne'er-do-wells you trounced have caught up to you, looking for revenge. One of each, actually. Very technical terms, these." He looked at Robin and Demetrius, mouthing 'No they're not,' before looking back at Maru.

"They're both human; vicious rogues, the both of them. They haven't gotten you cornered, but it's only a matter of time. You're in an alleyway in the capital city of Edanna, a bustling metropolis of epic—" He looked down and away, speaking very quietly, "—fantasy—" before returning to normal volume. "proportions." Maru giggled. "They're both on one end, and while the other end _is_ open, your short little dwarf legs were built to move at a steady pace come hell or high water, not move _quickly_ , and if you try to run they'll certainly catch you before you reach the end to make your escape. Rosek! What do you do?"

"Is there anything in the alley I can tip over in their way?"

Demetrius laughed. "Sometimes the simple solution is the best one."

She grinned. "Why work harder than I have to?"

"There are a few bits of detritus laying about, but nothing that has enough structure to be a substantial obstacle. There _are_ plenty of objects that could be used as improvised weapons, thrown or otherwise."

"I pick up the nearest appropriately sized piece of wood, and brandish it threateningly, but not very convincingly."

Robin and Demetrius looked confused, but Sebastian just waited with the barest hint of a smirk.

"Alright I see what you're doing, I think. Roll bluff, or sleight of hand, whichever is better."

"Bluff, absolutely."

"God, your stats are so wonky, this is gonna be super weird, and I'm already loving it."

"That's.. a twenty-one."

" _Solid_. The two scoundrels look at each other in disbelief, and begin to close the distance. They don't seem particularly worried about your apparent threat."

"A twenty-one was too _low_?" Robin was aghast, and finally Sebastian smiled.

"Just watch." He pointed. "Maru's got that smile on her face."

She did indeed, smiling like the cat that caught the canary. "I wait."

"Okay, I'm clearly missing something."

"They approach you, but the craftier looking of the two crosses his arms and leans on the wall a little ways away, presumably hanging back to keep a lookout for guards. The other stops outside swinging range of your makeshift club, scowling at you. 'Oy, you must be daft if you think that piece o' wood's enough to scare me.'" Kaleb's voice had dropped to a growling Cockney accent in but a moment.

"'Yeah? Your funeral, buddy.'" She looked at Kaleb questioningly. "Do I need to roll again..?"

"Nah, your first one was good for this little gambit. It's all one play, I guess you could say. If you switch tactics I'll probably have you roll again." He slipped back into his character voice for the rogue. "'I don't think _you'll_ be the one walkin' away from this, miss; just give us your coin, an' we'll be on our way.'"

"'Yeah, I think I'll pass. What, you think my devilishly good looks are all there is to me? For shame.'" Maru grinned.

Kaleb cackled. "Oh man, I haven't actually had someone play a proper Maverick type bard in a game before."

"What, like, the movie?"

"Yep." He looked back at Maru. "The man narrows his eyes, baring his teeth. 'Well, if you're so 'ellbent on gettin' stabbed today, I'll be 'appy to oblige!' He lunges towards you, a knife appearing in his hand as though from nowhere."

"I let him jam the point in the plank of wood, and while he's distracted I stab him with the dagger in my coat."

Robin gaped, and Sebastian laughed again. "Welcome to bards and rogues; if you think something seems fishy, it is."

"Go ahead and make your attack roll."

"Fifteen total."

"Okay, that's definitely enough to hit an unarmored, flat-footed opponent; his eyes widen a split second before you jam your dagger between his ribs, dropping him immediately."

"I don't roll for damage?"

"Normally you would, but with a twenty-one on your bluff check I'm willing to say you catch him totally by surprise; odds on he's dead."

"I point at the second guy and wave him over. 'Alright, come on, I haven't got all day!'"

"Roll intimidate this time."

"Oof, that's.. a six. Total."

"He straightens up, cracking his knuckles. 'See, you forgot somefin'; that little trick don't work a second time.'"

Demetrius shook his head. "God, how do you go from conversational to 'menacing cockney' that _fast_?"

"Practice. And now; Robin."

The woman in question looked at him with a start. "What? You're just leaving that in the middle?!"

"Yep! Don't worry, I have a plan! And for once that isn't a joke!"

"Okay.." She sounded unconvinced, but Kaleb only kept smiling.

"So, tell us about your character, Robin."

"Well.. I still feel like it's not as dramatic, but I was an orphan, and I fought to survive—Can I just re-write this?"

"You _can_ , that's part of the reason I do these intro-style sessions, but that's usually because you don't like the way the character plays. However, since you all had to submit your backstories so I could make sure they didn't rely on anything I didn't want to be true, or whatever, if you like I can give you a hand. Generally I don't, but this is your first time playing, so I can definitely understand. That's the GM's job, after all; facilitate an enjoyable gameplay experience."

"I don't want to just have you tell the whole thing, either.."

"Oh, no, not at all; don't worry, your character, your show."

"I guess." She looked down. "I just feel like I'm really out of my depth here."

"I think you're selling yourself short." Kaleb smiled. "Don't worry; like I said, I've read your backstory, you'll be fine. And so, we take a trip back in time, to when your story began.."

He straightened up, and yet again he was suddenly a different person; he leaned heavily on the table with one hand, glaring at the party. "'Buncha _street rats_ is what you are. I ain't got time for little shits who can't pull their _weight_ ,'" he sneered. "'So if you lot wanna sleep inside tonight, you best have something to show, eh?'"

Kaleb straightened back up, dropping into his normal posture. "This _perfect_ gentleman is Garbek of Voltaic; the patron of the city's largest orphanage, and all around snide bastard. The crowd of orphans murmur amongst themselves, unsure of what to do. One or two begin to cry, but they try their best to make sure he doesn't hear; it only ever makes things worse."

Robin was dumbfounded. "That's _bullshit_!" She barely stopped herself from slamming her fists on the table.

"That, dear listeners, was the heroine of our story; she stands in the middle of the crowd of orphans, the tallest by a head, and the de-facto leader of the bunch. And as you can clearly see, she is _furious_." He gestured to Robin. "Tell us about our heroine."

"Well, like you said, I'm tall for my age, and that never stops being true; fully grown, I'm six-foot-four, but right now I'm probably about five-foot-two? At this point I'm only thirteen, but I'm big enough that a lot of the time I get mistaken for a short adult. My name is Tabitha, but I refuse to add 'of Voltaic', because I _hate_ this damn city."

Kaleb smiled at the group; everyone was watching this play out with rapt attention, and Robin was completely absorbed in the scene. "But, Tabitha has a plan to get herself out of this 'damn city' for good; she's been saving up whatever money she can, sometimes just one copper piece at a time. But not for passage out of the city, or anything like that; no, that's just going to land her in poverty somewhere else. She's been saving up for a _bribe_ ; and today, just this morning, she snatched up a gold piece dropped by a drunken aristocrat. Today, Tabitha starts her journey. What do you do?"

"I wait for Garbek to go back inside, and then I quietly tell the kids around me that I'm going to be gone for a little while, but that they don't need to worry. The plan is still on."

"They look up at you, wide-eyed, and nod silently, then pass the message along."

"After that I go to the biggest tavern in the district; I've been going there a while to help out and get in good with the staff, so I go around to the back door and knock twice."

"Indeed you have. The dwarven cook pokes his head out." Kaleb's voice immediately dropped to a gravelly drawl. "'Tabitha, I havenae seen ya 'round for a week; you had me worried, I thought that bastard finally decided tae get rid of ye.'"

"Sorry, it's been tense; today's the day."

"His eyebrows go up, and he looks around nervously. 'Are ye sure ye want tae go through wi' this, Tabby? I know yer a tough lass and all, but this isn't a game, you could get yerself killed.'"

Maru gasped quietly. Robin nodded once. "I'm sure. I appreciate the warning, Torvok."

"He looks around again, then ushers you inside, closing the door. 'Yer in a bit o' luck, I suppose, the bookie's in high spirits today.'"

"Good. I can use every bit of luck I can get."

"He stops you as you go to leave. 'Tabitha, wait,' He reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a simple, woven cord, with a small carved wooden hammer on each end. 'I want ye to have this; it belonged to an old friend of mine, many years ago. He's since passed, bless him, but he gave me this and told me tae give it to the person who needed it most.' He laughs to himself. 'Said I was a smart old fart, and that I'd ken when I saw it. And the bastard was right. So here.'"

"I take it, even though I have no idea what it is. I tie it around my waist."

"It is at this moment that our friend Torvok is called to perform his actual job, and he waves as he goes, calling out 'Allfather watch over ye!'. The Allfather is a name for Moradin, the god of dwarves and creation."

"Well shit, it sounded like this belt is important, but I have no idea how to use it if it does something." Robin shook her head. "But I can worry about that later. I go find the bookie."

"You walk into the back room of the tavern, and there's a gruff looking older guy sitting at a table."

"Owyn."

"He looks up at you. 'You again? I told you, I'm not letting you fight—'"

"I toss him the pouch of coins. 'There's my entry fee.'"

"He opens it, taking a quick count, then looks at you like you're crazy. 'Your funeral, kid.'"

"We'll see."

"He grumbles, opening a ledger. 'Fine. What name are you using?'"

"..Steelheart."

Sebastian nodded in approval, but remained silent.

"He scribbles it down. 'You're up first. Hope you're ready.'"

"Just don't skip on paying me when I win."

Demetrius' eyes widened and he let out a low whistle. " _Damn_."

Robin smirked. "I go to wherever it is they've got set up as the waiting room."

"Nobody says anything, they just weave around you. Some are used to seeing you around, others just don't care."

"Fine by me."

"You get to where you're going, and an attendant looks you over in disbelief. 'You're shitting me. _You're_ Steelheart?'"

"Wait, how does he already know that?"

"Great question; you have no idea."

Robin shrugged. "Yeah, that's me."

"The guy sighs. 'Fine. Whatever. You know the rules, right?'"

"No weapons, no spellcasting, no deliberate maiming; the fight starts as soon as you get in the ring."

"He shrugs. 'Alright. At least you know what you're getting into. Just don't come crying to me.'"

"Don't worry, I didn't think you were the motherly type anyway." Robin grinned wickedly at the quiet ' _Savage_ ,' from Sebastian. "I go to the door and wait."

"You can hear the voice of a crier, calling out the odds of the match. As it stands, the house has your odds at three hundred to one against."

"Even better than I expected; that should be more than enough."

"The door opens; there's another door on the opposite side of the ring, and the walls are about five foot tall, made of wooden planks spaced out so the shorter races can still see. You opponent steps into the ring, then looks at the crier. ''Ey, is this some kind of joke? That's a little girl!'"

"As soon as he looks away, I rush him."

"Roll initiative."

Robin looked down at the assorted dice. "Uh.."

"The roundest one. That's the d20; when in doubt, that one."

She rolled. "I rolled a sixteen, and I add.. my dexterity?"

"The modifier, but yes. If I say 'add your dex', I mean the modifier. If I mean the score I'll say so explicitly."

"Then that's a nineteen."

"Alright." Kaleb rolled a die. "You go first regardless, because he is _not_ expecting the little girl to just sprint at him straight off the bat, and he's looking away. Are you making a charge, or a regular attack? If you charge, you have a better chance to hit, but a worse chance to defend. But if you go before him next turn, it won't matter."

"Gotta live up to the moniker, full steam ahead."

"Good attitude. Roll your attack."

She rolled the die again, beaming. "Twenty."

"Nat twenty, or twenty total? Sorry, short for natural, it means the die itself says twenty."

"Natural."

"Jesus, alright, this is gonna be a hell of a punch. Roll again."

"Huh? Why?" She rolled anyway. "Fifteen, plus.. wait, what do I add as a kid? Are my stats different?"

"Doesn't matter, fifteen is already enough." Kaleb rolled a die, nodding. "Roll damage."

"What do I roll for that?"

"A d3; which isn't real, so just roll the pyramid one—a d4—and reroll if you get a four. Or you can roll a d6—the normal looking one—and divide by two."

"Why would you do it that way?"

"I hate rolling d4s."

"Oh, okay." She rolled. "Three. I add my strength modifier, right?"

"Yep."

"Seven."

Sebastian laughed. "Of _course_ you have an eighteen in strength."

"I know what I'm about."

Kaleb shook his head. "Wow, you didn't even _need_ the belt. Alright. How's this go down?"

" _I_ get to decide? I thought that was your job."

Sebastian grinned. "He's saying the fight's already over. You just did _fourteen_ damage, because the twenty makes it a critical hit if you make the second roll, which you did. Most crits deal double damage, but some can do triple or—very rarely—quadruple."

"Crit?" Demetrius asked. "Is that an abbreviation of ' _crit_ -ical', or a portmanteau of the first and last two letters of 'critical' and 'hit'?"

"Great question; the term has been around for literal decades, if I had to guess I'd say the latter, but both work."

Sebastian nodded, then turned back to Robin. "Also I'd like to point out that if I were to punch someone the average result would be _one_ , because I'm a wizard and I'm weak, but your average character wouldn't do much better. Maybe two or three."

"Oh yeah, he doesn't even get to go, you just lay him the _fuck_ out; so, tell us what happens."

"Well, I'm thirteen, so I think I just run at him and put as much weight behind the punch as I can."

"So Steelheart enters the ring at a dead run, closes the distance, and throws a _vicious_ haymaker. By the time he realizes it's coming it's too late; her fist lands square on the side of his face. Much to everyone's surprise—including yours—at the moment of impact, there's a ringing sound like a hammer striking an anvil, and the blow sends him crashing back _through_ the door."

"Did you just punch a guy so hard he flew through a _closed door_?" Maru gaped at her.

"It sure seems like it." Robin was grinning. "Alright, I see why you guys like this game."

"The room is _silent_. No one really knows what to say; they just saw a thirteen year old punch a man so hard he got launched back out of the ring. What do you do now?"

"I raise my fist in victory, then get the hell out, because a lot of people just lost what they thought was going to be easy money."

"Good plan. You raise your fist in triumph, and as you walk out, you can hear some familiar sounding voices cheering from the crowd. Some of the other orphans are here. The cheers spread, and pretty soon the roar of applause fills the tavern." Kaleb smirked. "And that, my friends, is the day Tabitha.. became _Steelheart_. She collected her winnings, along with the bets placed by the orphans. This was enough to get her and the other kids out of the city, and to get the other kids set up as apprentices for various artisans around the country. Steelheart, though, she didn't stop there. She kept fighting, always moving from place to place, and always stepping in on behalf of the helpless or downtrodden. And so, a heroine of the people was born. Eventually, she would meet up with a dwarven bard who had found herself penniless on the streets of Edanna, and they joined forces to take on the various criminal fighting rings that sprung up around the city."

Sebastian looked at his mom, nodding with an approving smile. "That, was kick-ass."

Maru beamed. "Yeah! You were super into it, it was awesome!"

"You certainly make a good heroine, dear."

Robin blushed. "Aw, guys."

Kaleb smirked. "Told you your backstory was fine." He turned back to Maru. "This brings us back to you; you find yourself facing down a thug who you could _probably_ beat, but you also know that if he can get a good hit in you're done for. Rogues do a _lot_ of damage." He looked at Robin. "But as fate would have it, _you_ hear a familiar voice drift from an alley; 'Alright, come on, I haven't got all day!'"

"I look in the alley, and when I see her being threatened by a thug, I step into the alley. 'Hey! I remember you; you were a lot more unconscious last time, though.'"

"You two are going to be an absolute terror, I'm realizing."

The two women grinned. "Probably."

"The rogue turns, and snarls when he sees you. 'Oh, it's _you_.'"

"Last I checked."

"Surprisingly, he turns to run _past_ you, Rosek. Do you try to stop him, or just let him go?"

"I'd rather not get stabbed today. I go up to Steelheart instead. 'Fancy seeing you here.'"

"Oh, you know, I was in the area, thought I'd drop by."

Sebastian looked at Kaleb. "They got the hang of this _real_ fast."

"This is gonna be so much fun to run, I am _so_ excited." Kaleb looked at the two women. "So, the two of you go to catch up, I presume?"

"Yeah; we probably head to a tavern. Scene change?"

"Scene change. Elenstar, you arrive in town; there are a number of wanted posters and such hanging up, along with requests for odd jobs outside the city. Magical reagent procurement, things like that. Notably, there is a simple notice that reads 'Request for assistance with dangerous quest; I cannot pay, but you may keep anything of note we may find. Scoundrels need not apply; others may meet me outside of town on the third morning of the third week.' There's no signature, just a small sun emblem. The third morning of the third week is tomorrow."

"Pelor, huh.." Sebastian muttered. Kaleb noticed Demetrius smiling to himself, but said nothing. "If anyone would know about curses, it would be Pelor's followers. I don't have any other leads, and even if this person doesn't know, they probably know someone who does."

"Sounds reasonable." Kaleb looked at the girls again. "In what surely must be the strangest, most unexpected coincidence in _D &D history_, you two find the same notice posted outside the tavern." Sebastian snorted.

Robin nodded. "This is right up my alley, so Steelheart is in like, immediately. Danger? A dislike for scoundrels? Sign me up."

"Rosek is less inclined to danger, but she's also not stupid, and has no desire to be caught alone by more rogues, so she's in too." Maru paused. "Also I recognize a blatant plot hook when I see one."

"So, in the interest of moving things along, the three of you all make your preparations, and converge on the location described the following morning, around the time the sun is rising; there is only one other person present, presumably the one who posted the notice. They're wearing a greathelm with a tall feather—it's _very_ stylish—and there is a gleaming shield sitting next to them, made of a metal that Rosek recognizes immediately as mithril. Elenstar does as well, owing to the breadth of his experience. Steelheart.. it's real shiny, but that's about all you've got on that."

"Is Demetrius not here?"

"Demetrius?"

"Ah, you've arrived; I was beginning to think no one would heed my request."

"Oh, the knight _is_ dad." Maru nodded. "That makes sense."

Sebastian nodded. "I confess I have my own reasons for coming; however, they can wait, as this seems urgent."

Demetrius nodded. "Indeed it is. I find myself in a bit of a predicament; I have been tasked with the destruction of a nest of wights that have taken residence nearby, but my judgment suggests to me this is not a task to be attempted lightly."

"Wights.. Oh dear. Very well; how much does everyone know about wights?"

"Steelheart, Rosek, both of you have only heard the name, and that they're undead and evil."

"I know they're bad news, and that they don't bleed to death."

"Hmm. Well, wights can bludgeon foes with their fists, which is troublesome, but the devil is in the details; if they do hit you, they sap a portion of your life force each time. If you are slain by one, you will become one shortly after—a matter of seconds. A little under half a minute at the longest, and you will be under the control of the one who killed you."

"I see I was wise not to attempt this alone." Demetrius nodded. "Very well, does anyone need to make further preparations before we depart?"

"Given the nature of our foe, I have to ask; I know some of Pelor's followers have a particularly powerful turning ability. Are you one of those people?"

"'Hm? Oh, I apologize. I am not a follower of Pelor; I am an adherent of the Brotherhood of the Sun. I get that a lot, though, so don't worry about that.' I stand up, picking up my shield."

"The man stands, and as he buckles the large, circular shield to his arm, there is a brief gap in the early morning clouds; a brilliant beam of sunlight shines down on him, and there is a subtle hum of magic in the air. The shield is emblazoned with a brightly colored yellow sun, with red wavy lines suggesting fire, or heat."

Sebastian furrowed his brow, looking suspiciously at Demetrius.

"Well, my name is Rosek, and this is Steelheart."

"Well met, friends. I," a hint of a smile played about Demetrius' face, "am known as Solaire of Astora."

Sebastian was dumbfounded. "..You're _kidding_."

Demetrius grinned. "Praise the Sun."

"How did you even _build_ that."

Kaleb smirked. "That's for me to know and you all to find out."

Sebastian looked over in surprise. "What—does he not have his _own_ sheet?!"

"He does, but it's not complete. I won't say much more, but due to the way his stuff works, his character doesn't already know, it's more like a sorcerer just kinda _doing_ it, so he's going to be writing abilities down as he discovers them."

"Huh. That's actually kinda interesting. Alright, then.. let's go, I guess."

* * *

==unfinished bonus snippet

"The sun's warmth and light may warm the earth, and our skin, but it is our bonds with our loved ones that warm our hearts!" Everyone at the table stared at him. "..What?"

Sebastian stared at his dad for a moment longer before finally speaking. "..Did you just come up with that off the top of your head?"

"..no," Demetrius mumbled.

"Demetrius, are you saying you have spent _actual_ time out of game writing vaguely spiritual metaphors about the sun so you can yell them at suitably dramatic moments in-game," Sebastian deadpanned.

"..it wasn't _that_ much time, and besides, I wasn't _just_ doing that," Demetrius mumbled.

Sebastian snorted. "What were you even _doing_ that you had time to compose prose-laden metaphors?"

"..farming sunlight medals," Demetrius admitted sheepishly.

Sebastian swallowed, blinking a few times. ".. _nerd_."

Everyone decided to pretend they couldn't see how he was trying not to cry.

**Author's Note:**

> The second chapter of this is a series of cut sections about Demetrius playing Dark Souls, and a big section of actual campaign gameplay. They came into being as I wrote this, but I decided they were too dense and/or niche for inclusion in the main work; however, I still wanted to include the scenes for anyone who might be interested. 
> 
> This was originally two loops, but it made more sense to combine them, so there might be some things in the second chapter that don't _quite_ make sense, continuity-wise.


End file.
